Photos: Steve 2004for the school district ID, three of us appx.1983; Christmas 1976 our Newcastle garage Steve & Jerry,
At 3:00AM today December 18, Steve's big heart stopped beating. The call came and it was strange that I was awake before that just thinking about how we would face this.
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding, in all you do acknowledge Him and He will keep your path straight."
Steve has gone on and we hold onto his resting in peace in the Father's arms. We trust it was his time. I talked to the ICU earlier in the evening and the probing therapy, turning him onto his belly to relieve pressure on the lungs was not working. He just could not oxygenate. The doctors did not think he would make it. The infection in the lungs could not be overcome. I have been told this happens with diabetics. Hard to believe in this day and age of modern medicine but diabetes is so deadly.
Steve is gone. I'll no more hear those phone calls, "Hi, Mom, hate to ask this but.....or Hi Mom Don't worry everything will be all right or Hi Mom everything OK there?" It's been a day of phone calls and making long distant arrangements for CA. We hold tightly to each other. We are thankful for his friends and his support system in CA. They honor us by seeing this through and helping clear his possessions, etc. One said today that this must be for the best. Had he made it through this ordeal he would have been in rehab for a long time, mayber more than a year to recover and he would not have been happy.
Steve's memorial service to celebrate his 44 years with us will be in Auburn CA on January 10. I am thankful to have my home church, Pioneer United Methodist, to back us up. We saw no need to try to arrange something during holidays. We all are faced with dreary times as is.
I know 2 hymns for the service; the first Be Not Afraid which was just played for my Uncle Henry. I love it too as it reminds me of Pope John Paul. And to close I want "You'll Never Walk Alone" which my mom wanted and which we had as her final song.
We will use a favorite poem for the memorial service.
The Traveler By James Dillet Freeman
He has put on invisibility.
Dear Lord, I cannot see—
But this I know, although the road ascends
And passes from my sight,
That there will be no night;
That You will take him gently by the hand
And lead him on
Along the road of life that never ends,
And he will find it is not death but dawn.
I do not doubt that You are there as here,
And You will hold him dear.
Our life did not begin with birth,
It is not of the earth;
And this that we call death, it is no more
Than the opening and closing of a door—
And in Your house how many rooms must be
Beyond this one where we rest momently.
Dear Lord, I thank You for the faith that frees,
The love that knows it cannot lose its own;
The love that, looking through the shadows, sees
That You and he and I are ever one!
I can gain some comfort in knowing Steve is with my Dad and they are making a great relationship--the father I never knew with the son we had for too short a time. Sometimes this feels like a nightmare, other times too real.
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