Saturday, May 23, 2015

May 23, 2015 and Memorial Weekend

Steve two months old
50 years ago this morning Steve was born, a small baby they said at 6 lbs, 6 ounces, but it was a difficult birth for me.  I still recall the agony and have never understood those women who claim giving birth is such a  wonderful experience. I remember the old nurse at McClellan hospital yelling at me to shut up that she'd had six babies and it didn't hurt that much.  I said, "good for you, bitch"  or something like that.   I think back to the dreams I had then and settle into the moments of today, this Memorial Day Weekend.  50 years later,  and the multitudes of life events.  Steve left this earth December 2008 and our lives took a steep turn there, it was and remains painful.  One wonders why some of us are given heavy burdens and surely we will never know all the answers on this side of the universe.  

So Memorial Day weekend when we  decorate graves here for relatives who have passed on and we pause to remember, it  stirs deeper.  His birthday was not often over Memorial Day weekend as it is this year.  We  remember and always will and wonder. We remember those long Memorial weekend camping trips to Stumpy Meadows in Georgetown, California with  many friends to the group campsite that we reserved annually.  Many of those friends have also ended their earthly journey.   

1966, Jinx, Baba, Mom
So many relatives and friends  have gone on and it is expected  to lose the older generation, my grandparents,  Mom, Aunt  Jinx, Uncle Carl, Aunt Marge, Uncle John, Barney, Florence (MIL), Bob Wiley, Phil Malnick, and more.  I remember my father, whom I never knew, a WWII pilot gone with his crew June 1944, I would be born in November.  Life would have been different I know if he had lived. As we remember Steve, we consider he is at peace.  I have accepted long ago but that does not mean I no longer wonder. So over this Memorial
Day, along with flowers to the graves and observance of  military taps played at the cemetery, why remains the unanswered question.  No answer it just is and so it will be for us to remember always. 

I found this mournful yet fitting verse online, no author was cited......I know we did our best and as a friend said, Steve was a happy little boy.     
Steve 1974 Van Damme State Park

  I will lend you, for a little time,
A child of mine, He said.
For you to love there while he lives,
And mourn for when he's dead.
It may be six or seven years,
Or twenty-two or three.
But will you, till I call him back,
Take care of him  for Me?
He'll bring charms to gladden you,
And should his stay be brief.
You'll have his lovely memories,
As solace for your grief.
I cannot promise he will stay,
Since all from earth return.
But there are lessons taught down there,

I want this child to learn. 

Sunday, May 10, 2015

Techie gadgets and more access to my mind

Back when I created this blog I never thought I would run out of things to say or write here, but  changes happen and as quickly as technology changes sooner or later the change flows to our habits.  If we are wise and want to keep up. we go with the flow.  If we want to cling to old times, ways, habits and not learn we dig in our heels and proceed in our old familiar rut and we become as obsolete as the black and white tv's of yore.  The changes remind me of my late mother in law who  was always behind the times, having stalled somewhere in the early 1950's and refusing to learn more or expand her horizons.  She muddled through the rest of her life up to 96 years  in a muddle of being out of touch, backwards, left behind, bewildered.    

Old habits like this blog do not give up easily and from time to time, the blog specter haunts me, as a thought crosses my mind, "now that might be worth blogging."  It was once an easy way to communicate and ponder or to document my ponderings. Not so today as I have changed tactics to accommodate these mental flashes in the moment.  It is easier to  snap the  photo with my smart phone and share on Facebook in the moment and are we not supposed to practice being in the moment?    I don't have to sit down at  the keyboard and log in to the blog, type and edit and ponder, all I do is snap, click, share the photo and the thoughts and  into cyberspace, sharing with many more than ever frequent the blog.  

 After my March 31 health scare, I became even more of a rabid fitness freak and decided one of the monitors for activity would be my next techie purchase.  So it happened that I have acquired  my fitness watch monitor, also by Samsung,  my Gearfit.  My  simple post onto Facebook asking for recommendations about a month ago gave me rapid responses that most of my friends were using the Fit Bit wrist monitors.  Several gals at zumba use that and yet wear a watch besides.  That very day as I would head off to purchase my new  gadget, Fit bit issued a massive recall on their  wrist monitors, some had burns from the  applications.  Again several Facebook friends alerted me about the recall and I had read that morning's news from my Wall St Journal, also on my smartphone, that Fitbit was recalling these particular devices.  Either there was a sensitivity to the  nickel in the stainless steel or some  claimed they had a radiation type burn from wearing their  wristbands. 

 Nevertheless I was sure as I drove to Sam's and Best Buy that I would buy the Fitbit  and one that would sync to my smartphone where I already had a Health app to monitor steps, track health indicators, etc.  I  do not always carry the phone with me and really a wristband would be so much handier.  Sam'sClub was my first stop where there were several options and I was still favoring the Fit bit but decided to drive over to Best Buy where even more  varieties awaited.  Yes the Fitbit would sync with both my PC and my smartphone android.  There were so many options but do I really need to check my Facebook notifications and email on my wrist?  Probably not, yet I saw no sense in wearing a wristband and watch so I would get that combination and of course wanted the heart monitor and the various  fitness applications.  Something about the fitbit besides the black strap was not attractive, the watch option was bulky looking and the smaller one would be difficult to read without cheater glasses.  Then I  saw the Samsung Gear Fit and decided it was for me, I am  quite happy with my Samsung Galaxy phone and have been impressed with quality of our Samsung TV's.  The Samsung display is much more attractive,  a touch screen and I can change the wallpaper to match my outfits.  All it lacks is some bling on the plain black wristband, but it also is small enough to adapt to my wrist and does not look bulky nor require reading glasses.  

I have had it now for almost a month and really like it, in fact wear it all the time, addictively.  It can even monitor my sleep patterns but I have decided I am not comfortable wearing it to bed.  I already know I am an active sleeper, I travel in my sleep as well as getting up and down several times a night for bathroom calls. I check my progress and find most days I  rack up over 11 or 12 thousand steps where my goal was 10 thousand. It does prove that one burns way fewer calories than expected and that is why many who claim to be exercising are puzzled when their weight stays the same.  We really need to work our bodies hard for long periods of time to burn up calories, for example 3021 steps or 1.3 miles only consumes 83 calories for my body.  Proof that both food restriction and exercise are needed to maintain a healthy weight.  I congratulate my self on my physical over achievement.  The Fitgear also gets my text messages which is handy and runs 3 to 4 days without needing plugged in to recharge.  And so another techie gadget has become a part of me and taught me more applications and fitness awareness.  By the way, the cardiologist  gave me a good to go and keep it up on Thursday and said to come back after a year.