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Friday, September 9, 2011

Sepia Saturday 91 Hidden stories in photos (Click here to go to the Sepia site)

While my photo this week may appear to be one of folks merely enjoying travel, standing or admiring scenery, there is a story  behind the faces, an unsuspected tale of secrets, jealousies, pettiness and revenge amidst the  unsuspecting.  These two photos are not that old, certainly not Sepia quality, taken in  June,1980 the year we drove to Minnesota from California to attend an aunt and uncle's 50th wedding anniversary.  With  the three of us, we took Jerry's mother (MIL) Florence and her husband, Jerry's  stepfather and (FIL), Lyman Larson.  It was her eldest sister's Golden anniversary and they could not have gone otherwise; so as a dutiful son, Jerry with my agreement, he says at my urging, invited them to come along.

It amazes me to look back to those years when we 5  grown people Jerry, Steve who was 16, myself and the two inlaws all traveled in our  cab over camper truck the entire  approximately 1800 miles, one way.  Today, Jerry & I have another new  luxurious 40  foot motor coach, with slide outs for travels, our retirement house on wheels.  But back in 1980 we thought we were right uptown with the camper.  There is no way I would squeeze into any such accommodations today to travel and certainly  not with four others, but back then we did.  Steve rode mostly in the back except when he shared in the driving.  We had  4 drivers, Jerry, Lyman who drove bus in Los Angeles, myself and Steve, so  we planned to  drive right along through the night, alternating drivers, stopping only for gas and making the  journey in two days. 
 

Arrival in  Minnesota, left to right
Lyman, Jerry and Florence
 By the time we arrived in Minnesotta about 70 miles from our destination, Jerry, Steve and I  knew we were  down to three drivers, but we kept that secret.  Lyman, though well intended had started to doze off on his driving shift, which Steve and Jerry both noticed from their seats in the cab; the agreement was that at night  another person would stay awake with the driver, so while Jerry tried to merely rest his eyes, Steve was wide awake.   I was snoozing in the back of the camper with  MIL.  Steve made Grandpa pull over at the next stopping place and took a shift, while Grandpa Lyman was shifted to the back to bed, and I staggered to the front cab to snooze.   This photo shows Jerry with coffee cup in hand after pulling the longest shifts driving, insisting that he was not in the least tired so that Lyman would not feel it necessary to  help drive.   If Lyman ever realized that he had been permanently relieved of driving, we never knew.  Jerry just said, he could drive and did so with infrequent help from us two.  

Our return trip involved sightseeing stops and overnight rests at motels; we were not in such a hurry to return home and Lyman had wanted to see some of Yellowstone and other sights.  He was enjoying not having to drive for once in his life and maybe a rare if not the only trip where he could just sight see.  We returned through  the Black Hills of South Dakota, the badlands, and Yellowstone.  We have many pictures of this trip, but the following photo is one that sticks out for Jerry and me after something I  read early this year, 31 years later.  Lyman died in 1990 but Jerry's mother, Florence is still alive at 95, in the local nursing home with dementia but physically pretty good. 

1980 at Yellowstone   Lyman, Jerry, Florence
You can see in this photo that Lyman is enjoying the sights; this was just one of our stops in Yellowstone.  I recall when I took this photo that Lyman had mentioned to be sure to get copies of the pictures for him when we developed these because he had lost his camera somewhere on our trip, or so we all thought; we had even back tracked when he discovered it missing.  It was filled with memories and photos he had taken on the trip, relatives, the family gatherings and now the sights, well the sights until the camera disappeared. It was kind of unusual for him to take so many photos but this was a different trip for him and one he wanted to remember.  Generally all the trips to Minnesota were he and Florence and while they were younger their daughter and son.  Lyman was so very upset but said at least he was seeing the sights and that was worth it and if we shared photos it would be all the same to him.  Florence standing there with her coat collar covering her mouth to shield the smell of the sulfur from the hot spring behind, Dragon's Mouth. Later when Lyman saw this photo he teased about having the Dragon Mouth out there with us, referring to Florence.

Here is where appearances are most deceiving and most unrevealing.  Florence had been in some sort of snit after we left Minnesota, none of us knew why, but she made it her mission to make sure everyone became miserable.  When her misery was not shared by the rest of us,  she declared herself ill and demanded that we get her home to California  quickly.  Jerry vehemently told her that we were going to see some things as planned and that we could stop at a local emergency room to determine what was wrong with her.  Suddenly she was no longer ill.  We never knew what had set her off, but went along our way and did tour Yellowstone, enjoying its wonderful sights. 

Flash forward to 2011, when early in the year I was browsing through some of Florence's writings in the calendar/journals she kept, before we tossed them. There it was 1980, June and so I thought maybe she had some reflections about the trip.  She had written very little about  her sister's Golden wedding anniversary and other visits.  But, she bitterly wrote how she did not want to leave Minnesota to just drive and see sights as Lyman and Jerry planned.  This was not a surprising statement because she is a very self centered person, quite selfish at times, has been all through her life.  Jerry recalled many bad decisions she made, over the years always thinking of herself and her needs.  But then, reading the remarks she made along the journey home, came the revelation of how twisted and evil this woman could be.  

It was in the South Dakota Badlands when Jerry, Steve, Lyman and I left the camper to walk along an area and just observe the vultures circling.  Florence intended to suffer and had been saying very little, but said she did not want to see the dirty birds or the hills.  So we all left her in the camper at  the parking lot.  And she wrote...."..Well I tossed his damn camera in the trash and I covered it up so they could not see it.  While they walked along I saw to it that he would not have any pictures......"  Although nothing really surprises me about MIL at this point, I was astonished and called Jerry to read it himself.  He too was astonished and commented something like, "Well that old witch did it, that's what happened to Lyman's camera!" 

She never said a word when the four of us searched and backtracked several miles looking in vain for that camera.  Yet she very well knew what she had done.  Why?  Who knows?  Jerry said, that explained her "tantrum" along the trip, not getting things her way.  And yet, he admitted over a lifetime now he can look back and see how she was manipulative and vengeful. I consider it downright mean.  So today when people may think, what a sweet old lady, we know differently for many reasons, one being the missing camera.  While we wondered if she ever told Lyman what she did, we think not.  That is the story hidden behind this photo.  We will never look at it the same way again.

As always, click on the title to this post to go over to the Sepia site and see others' photos and tales. 

17 comments:

  1. Amazing the little and major secrets that we have amongst are family members sometimes, and not always does the real story come to surface...you gotta just love them! What a great and interesting story...and that camper over your pick-up cab was all the rage about those years...anyone was lucky to have one. My brother in law lived in one while their house was being built.....! Those were the days my friend...

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  2. Goodness, that’s one heck of a story there! It just goes to show that pictures alone sometimes don’t tell it all and an eyewitness account can be invaluable.

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  3. MIL sounds awful. I wonder how her husband could stand her so long.

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  4. Being one who looks for the positive, I think finding that journal is comforting. Now you've seen evidence that your opinion of the MIL was justified and not just a product of prejudice. One question remains. What events in her childhood, or what flaw in her personality made her into such a witch?
    Tom

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  5. Postcardy, He was her 2nd husband and the arrangement suited both of them; he was a control freak and kept her in a delayed state of adolescence; she looked to him to take care of everything, unless as this story goes, something did not suit her and then the nasty emerged. There are so many stories looking back over our years and the more I have learned from other family; she really was not all there, all her life. Now with dementia it's still the same, delusions and always trying to stir bad feelings amongst people...Ahh, it is a long story.

    Tom, for sure. Who knows why, she was the baby of the family of 4 older sisters and from a toddler exhibited these self centered ways. We know she never really grew up beyond adolenscence. Lots of stories for my book.

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  6. OOPs, she is 94 not yet 95 I must correct that typo.

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  7. Every picture tells a story - not always a truthful or happy one. I suppose the camera got thrown away with the rubbish. What a trip.

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  8. I don't know how you all survived that long trip!

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  9. it certainly sheds a new light on the picture...
    not a nice lady after all...
    still, human nature is such and you get to meet all kind.

    BUT THAT IS SO MEAN!!!!!
    it's not even funny...
    poor Lyman!!
    may he r.i.p.

    surprising though that nobody tossed HER in the trash!!

    thanx 4 sharing!!
    :)~
    HUGZ

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  10. What a story. It has almost everything - intrigue, danger ... the lot. But most of all (to me, at least) it is full of the very scale of your country, those vast distances which we over here on a small and crowded island have difficulty imagining.

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  11. Amazing story. I love a road trip but this was one that I wouldn't want to go on!

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  12. I so enjoyed this post and reading about your trip! Some people are so revengeful that it is hard to even fathom how their minds work. I feel really bad for Lyman ... he had to be with her day in and day out. Maybe she should have stayed in Minnesota and taken the train home, lol.

    Take care,

    Kathy M.

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  13. Ticklebear, Believe me if we had known back then what she had done, there would have been fireworks. She made fools out of the 4 of us who searched and even Jerry drove back to other sites we'd stopped looking for that camera until Lyman said, "give up."

    Over our years ofmarriage, I have observed her do many nasty things and learned a lot more; I may continue with the Florence next week. Lots of photos of her and as I said she is still on the planet, still divisive and well, still herself.

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  14. Ah yes, an unfortunate traveling companion. I had a trip like that Through Europe with one friend driving the other two nuts. The constant, "I want to go home" on a daily basis had me close to strangling her. I finally blew up in Paris and told her I would personally take her to the airport the next day and that I did not want her around anymore ruining the trip. Then I marched out of the hotel to spend an evening in Paris with a weight off my shoulders.

    It really is amazing how petty some people can be when the intention is for all to be on an adventure and in harmony.

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  15. that's a shame really, leaving behind such memories...
    :/~
    HUGZ

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  16. Well, what a story that was! It's a shame someone can take pleasure in spoiling other people's enjoyment.

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  17. Incredibly story, well told! Some people are just mean by default.

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