Sepia Saturday February 20

Ostrowski (aka Ostroski) my maternal grandmother’s family appx. 1910 Mystery gathering

Preparing this for Sepia Saturday reminded me how difficult my genealogical research has been. I must get some of this organized to share with whoever from the next generation might be interested. I have been asked to send what I have to the Mroz adult children of my cousin Roland who died in Madison in October. My Polish history becomes complicated due to the various spellings of the names. This happened all too commonly with the immigrants. It was Ostrowski, also spelled as Ostroski, Ostroskie, depending on who singed and wrote their name. In addition many changed their names to a more accepted Americanized version as my uncle did by changing Kochanowski to Konesky; some even changed their first names to something very different, for example, Walter became known as Bill. I suppose part of this was by reason of wanting to be accepted, to fit in.  Yet life was extrememly segregated by ethnic heritage.  Another curious name game in my family is the repetitive use of the same name within families. This happened with Helen, Frank and Francis, Frances, and John. It must have been comical at a family event when they called for John and three boys responded!


In about 1977, before she died, my Great Aunt Frances, my (maternal) grandmother’s baby sister gave me this photo. She is seated on the ground, in this photo, between the two boys, second person from the left with a big bow or flower in her hair. I knew that she was the youngest of my grandma’s family of sisters and brothers. But until she began to talk about the photo, I did not know that her father, my great grandfather, Frank Ostrowski had three wives two of whom he outlived. She knew nothing about where it was taken or why. But this photo is the only such of a gathering of the Ostrowski clan to my knowledge.



Great Aunt Frances was born in 1906, which makes me guess that her age is about four in the photo which then dates this to about 1910. She married a Mroz. I tried for years to identify all the relatives. Neither my mother nor my aunts were able to identify all the people or why the photo was taken. I know which ones are my grandmother and her sisters and brothers, all standing in the back, young folks, some forcing a straight face. My grandmother’s sister, Mary has such a twinkle in her eye that it appears hard for her to look grim. I always remember this about Great Aunt Mary; she was a happy soul, full of laughter. Actually most of my grandmother’s relatives were jovial people, who enjoyed what little they had and certainly reveled in each other’s company.



My mother speculated this photo was taken in Ohio at a funeral that was a family scandal, something no one talked about. I don’t know how she knew that if she knew little else. It was the end of the conversation in her kitchen in PA during one of my visits home, as she walked away leaving me to my thoughts and to accept her explanation. My mother died of Alzheimer’s in 2004 and I believe that she had early symptoms which we did not recognize. So who knows if her comment was from dementia or truth? I accepted that as closed conversation. That was a prevalent way to deal with questions in my family, no one talked about anything. If they didn’t speak it or repeat it, it didn’t happen. I don’t know if all immigrant families had this same way of dealing with life, but my Polish family kept things to themselves. There is a Polish proverb about not speaking of misfortune so that the devil does not gain an open door to enter and bring in more trouble. I suspect the immigrants were cautious of discussions and suspicious as most of them had fled Poland to escape oppression. I am different and want to know and tell our stories. Too bad that as a child I didn’t pay more attention. I wonder what might have been the scandal worthy of stoic silence in this mystery photo. By the time I received this photo, my grandmother and all her sisters and brothers were long gone so there is no one to ask.



Great Grandfather Frank Ostrowski is seated in the middle row, third from the left. His third wife who is Great Aunt Fran’s mother, Helen Sekoski (aka Sajikowski) is 2nd from the left next to him. Frank (aka Franz) Francis Ostrowski is a story unto himself what I have learned about him in research. He immigrated from Poland and made his living as a coal miner in PA.



Here are the folks I know for sure:

Seated on the ground on what appears to be carpet, the front row: 2nd from left between 2 unidentified boys, Great Aunt Fran Ostrowski Mroz; after the 2nd boy, in a plaid dress with her hair parted in the middle is Annie Ostrowski Kaluzney and Gorleski, my grandmother’s cousin, unknown child next to her. Notice that none of these kids look very happy!



Second row from the left: Unknown woman, next to her, 2nd woman is Helen Sekoski, then Great Grandfather Frank, unknown couple, the people in the rest of the row are unidentified but I suspect Annie’s mother may be seated right behind her.



Third (Back) row from the left: (most are my grandmother Rose’s sisters, brothers, full or half siblings; progeny of Franks first two wives)  I have included the married names of the women.



Joseph John Ostrowski (surviving Twin whose brother died shortly after birth), unknown woman, we speculate that might be Katherine Buhl whom Joseph married; she resembles the woman at the end left in the second row, John Martin Ostrowski; Bill (nee Walter F) Ostrowski who changed his last name to Austin, unknown man, Mary Ostrowski Janosky, unknown man with his arm through my grandmother’s arm, My grandmother Rose Ostrowski Kochanowski, unknown man, Veronica (aka Vernie) Ostrowski Roginski, Ben (nee Bernard John) Ostrowski, Ben’s wife-Anna Boguzinska Ostrowski and their first born Walter (Louie).



There you have it the Mystery gathering. In 2002, my research led a previously unknown cousin to me. That was interesting as we pieced together different pieces of the puzzle of the Ostrowski clan. Today I have not heard from Sharon in months as she has not returned emails or answered her phone when we are in PA. Not sure what is going on with her. I have genealogy which traces Frank Ostrowski’s line to Poland in the 1300’s supplied by another 2nd cousin, Maxine, in Utah. Complicated strings of Polish links.

& here is link to the Sepia Sat site, I hope, if you would like to see others tales and  photos
http://sepiasaturday.blogspot.com/2010/02/sepia-saturday-week-12.html   

This is for Tuesday February 16, Magpie Tales

Without further ado, I give you my 2-16 Magpie Tale.....let me know, I know you will how this hit you or not....maybe next week it will be briefer, the  photo from Willow and the challenge got the best of me.... the challenge was to simply write something about the photo....and how the object came to your possession...

So there it sets one last trinket to pack, the old Pewter mug. Oh who knows what it really is, mug, ice bucket, jar, tankard. Besides that who knows if it’s even pewter. She’d never done the research she’d meant to do about it, but what did it matter now? Maybe later she would get to that after all; now she had nothing but time. The past year had been all consuming.



Diane picked up the old pewter mug, rubbing its sides, as she sighed and smiled. Lord knows she’s had little to smile about over the past year…Walt’s diagnosis, chemo, surgeries, radiation, hospice, the bitter ending, the funeral, but she smiled. This mug was the sole possession she had from her Granpa. Lots of memories, but no stuff. Ahh who needs stuff anyway? What’s it matter now?


Her family had little to leave as inheritance; that’s what she’d thought. “I never thought I would inherit anything and so I should not be disappointed.” When Mom died, her brother and his wife had scoured her home. Diane was lucky to get this old mug. Something no one else wanted. By the time she’d arrived home for the funeral there was nothing left but dust and dirt, her school photos and this old mug. They said they had left it for her. Big of them. That was the last time she had seen them, 15 years ago. Why even think about them now? When the estate attorney’s settlement letter arrived, months later, she was astonished at the rest of the story. Her brother had diverted $200,000 cash from Mom’s accounts to his own name. Under the estate laws he had pulled a fast one. Money she never knew Mom had. Ahh, water under the bridge. It happens in all families, she just never would have believed it would happen to her. Walt had urged her to “call the s.o.b and ask him for your half of the money as your mom had in her will,” Diane never did that. “NO I will not give him the satisfaction of knowing how deeply he hurt me.,” was all she would say about it. Now after years it mattered not at all, money only money.


Diane hugged the old pewter mug and remembered Granpap’s tales that it had belonged to an old man who used if for his last ante in a poker game. The old man had been a successful gold miner, but had squandered his wealth on drink and worse habits. Granpap won the mug playing cards in the back of the butcher shop. The old man had nothing left but the pewter mug but the guys had compassion and let him play out his hand. Granpap won that game and collected his winnings. He pushed the mug back across the table to the old man who would not take it, saying, “No you won it fair and square, you keep it.” They heard he had died later that week, drunk in the gutter, with no family or friends to grieve after him. Diane had heard the story so many times despite the protest of her grandma, who never could stand the sight of the pewter mug. To grandma it represented Granpap’s poker playing for which she had little use and further more she did not believe the old man could have ever been wealthy! “How could someone lose all they had?” Ahh grandma, if you were here today you’d likely ask that again, “how can someone lose all they had?”


But Granpap kept the pewter mug right beside his chair to hold his pipe and tobacco pouch. Granpap always said everyone needs someone to remember about them after they are gone from this valley of tears, so he would do that for the old man by keeping his mug. After both granpap and grandma died, her Mom put the mug in the basement to hold a scouring pad and Fels Naphtha soap alongside the stationary tub. Diane remembered asking her mother if she could take it with her when she left for college, to hold her pencils, pens, scissors. Mom would not allow that, saying, “Not that dirty old thing, you will disgrace yourself.”


Really all Diane wanted was something physical from her grandparents to hold onto. The pewter mug would be something that would always remind her of them and of the old man she never knew. But she had often imagined stories about that old man, how he regained his money and positions of prominence once more. She always liked a happy ending but she had gotten to know life was sparse on happy endings. Yet, even if that ex-brother, that’s how she thought of him, left the mug for her as an insult, he would never know that he had given her a treasure.


The mug became the holder of Diane and Walt’s bucket list, something else that doesn’t matter anymore. Diane looked over the packed and sealed moving boxes pondering where to put this pewter relic. Tomorrow the foreclosure agents would arrive to seize this house for the bank. This house that was supposed to be their down sized retirement home. Ahh, the plans they had, to down size and travel at whim. She recalled a sign she’d seen somewhere, “We plan and God laughs!” Laughs, well he’d pulled a good one on them. If this was God’s idea of a joke, well then she simply did not get it. God is not cruel. Diane believed in the loving presence that had guided her most of her life. Somehow somewhere there has to be good. Diane let the tears seep over her cheeks as she thought of Walt as she recalled that line from “The Help”,”Sooner or later we just have to run out of awful!”


Diane unfolded the bucket list that they had so carefully crafted from the pewter mug. She read over their plans, plans that must have tickled the Lord who took Walt from her too soon. Plans-- first class air plane rides to England; a cruise on the Mediterranean; three months in their RV to Alaska; time in a first class five star hotel in Charleston; ride a horse around the Kentucky derby track; fly a single engine plane over the ocean to the Bahamas. ….more…as her tears flowed. Diane quickly sighed and with that breath got an urge to burn the Bucket list, it’s useless, a fantasy. Why not, a closing ritual for what would be her last night in their almost retirement home. Burn it in the pewter mug; fitting. Granpap would laugh that the mug would again have ashes.


Diane found some matches and stepped over to the kitchen sink. Diane struck the match, lighting the list afire….ouch, ow, oh damn! She’d singed her fingers, as she swore out loud and dropped the list and the mug, she stomped on the embers of the list that had fallen to the floor, and she looked at the pewter mug that had bounced with a vengeance on the ceramic tile floor! What, oh no, the mug broke from its base! Looks like we are not quite yet running out of awful---as Diane knelt to the floor, she could not believe her eyes…..the bottom of the mug had broken, it had been so solid, so heavy,. She’d never thought it could come apart….but there it was in two pieces. Scattered near it? What is that? Can it be, many gold nuggets…….her tears mingled with amazed laughter, can it be real? Maybe we are out of awful after all! Maybe the old man was a miner.


I became Diane’s hospice care attendant in the last months of her life. She’d shared the tale of the Pewter mug with me. The gold nuggets were her financial windfall, her inheritance. She asked if I would like to have the old pewter mug, which I accepted gratefully, assuring her that I would always remember her, her granpap and the old miner when I looked at it.

 
Thanks to Willow for dreaming up this challenge....and I do love her  Magpie Stamp which she has so graciously shared here for the readers....stay tuned for Next week!  It has been a long time since I have even thought about a magpie!

Sepia Saturday

I have just signed onto a new blog, Sepia Saturday which I discovered through Willow who BTW has set up  Magpie Tales to be unveiled here on February 16, Tuesday....But Sepia Saturday offers a place to share my  wonderful old photos and my  thoughts and meanderings about these.  "Launched by Alan Burnett and Kat Mortensen in 2009, Sepia Saturday provides bloggers with an opportunity to share their history through the medium of photographs. Historical photographs of any age or kind."   Just yesterday I posted copies of  newsclippings I had salvaged from 1959 of our Jr. HIgh School basketball team.  I am amazed that these survived all these years in my collection of photos, from PA to CA, in CA and finally back here to MN in retirement.   

So here we have the 1959 championship boys’ basketball team,  well girls sports were not sponsored back then as they are today pre-title IX ( the number may be off) and the rest. So we gals were loyal supporters of our team; we played girls basketball in gym class and that was the extent of it. I know I have always been a basketball fan but seeing these clippings cemented just how devoted a fan I was. And don’t forget if there was a sports team, there were the cheerleaders. I never had ambition to be a cheer leader and I would have been way too clumsy and uncoordinated anyway. Just as well, it allowed me to be busy as usual on the bleachers and around the area, visiting, being verbal, etc.  



Today I am in touch with some of these people through hometown connections and Facebook. It is a long way from Ridge Avenue Jr. High School. Our class moved to Ridge Ave which was the former high school after the new high school was built out the road. Ridge Ave Jr. High was much closer to my home than the old 4th Avenue School downtown where we went to 7th grade. I had forgotten that, but my friend Kathy Zabec reminded me of it in a conversation last year. It takes a cadre of old friends to retrieve long buried memories.

We were such busy kids, running up and down all the hills around New Kensington, PA. No one ever got a ride to or from school. Most families had only one car if that and Dad usually had it at work. We did wear out the soles of our shoes, which were then replaced if our feet had not grown. Every day in 7th grade, we ran that mile or more home and back to school for lunch. There was no school cafeteria and no one suggested carrying lunch to school. It had to be at least a mile from our neighborhood up the hill to the downtown Fourth Ave. Jr. High, but we trekked that four times a day, to school, home for lunch, back to school, and home again in the afternoon, rain, snow, sleet or sunshine. It didn’t faze us. We just did it. No one talked to us about needing exercise and we had little problem with childhood obesity all the concern today. It was a different world.  I found this picture taken my last day of 6th grade, standing in the alley near our home, notice the hill behind me.  I remember looking so forward to junior high.  I don't remember looking this dorky, but here we have it, my own handwriting across the bottom of the photo.  
 

So moving up the hill to Ridge Avenue for 8th and 9th grade with a school only 5 blocks from my home was a big benefit. It was easier to go home for lunch and I can remember even having time to eat leisurely and catch some of the TV soap operas if my grandma was at our house. She followed Guiding Light and Search for Tomorrow which had migrated from radio.

Today this old junior high after sitting empty for years has been leveled and renovated into lovely senior housing. I wonder if any of my school friends will eventually live there.  I will have to take a photo of it the next trip back home, then and now.  I heard they sold the bricks from the old school.  Some of my friends bought those.  Think about it how would you like to move into your old junior high school in your real senior years!

To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee

thanks to Carlie for catching my backwards listing of the author in the title   .I have now corrected... proving once again the need for human eye to  carefully review.. what is written by human fingers....

All I can say is, it is about time that I started to read some wonderful old books which I have been meaning to reread. I have shelves full of classics and books I read at Allegheny College. Once in awhile Oprah would pick a classic and I enjoyed reading those. After I read “The Help” and Boo Radley was mentioned, I was prompted to reread Mockingbird and what a great read. I found my 1963 paperback copy of “To Kill a Mockingbird “by Harper Lee; the date is 1963 inside inscribed with my maiden name. I faintly recall we had to read this for a Modern Lit. Class. I know I have seen the old Gregory Peck movie too, but rereading it, was just like something new. I faintly recalled the plot and a few of the characters, but enjoyed it just as though it was a first time read.

It's a sin to kill amocking bird, because they are so harmless, they merely sit and sing and imitate grandly.   
I do remember loving the book back then when we had to read it, such wonderful writing. That is what I miss often today, excellent writing, real literature, descriptive words, not fill in the blanks pabulum. Well, sometimes, I confess I will read drivel just to download and clear the brain. But I do prefer to be an engaged reader. And that is what Mockingbird requires.

Look at that cover of my book which cost me sixty cents, 37 years ago. Upper right hand corner,  sixty cents.  A publication of Popular Library.  The pages are yellowed, but crisp and readable. I am amazed that I have this along with my old 1961 Don Quixote from back in the day. Considering my moves from PA to CA and around CA and now back to MN, it is incredible that these two books have been on the journey with me. But then I remember that we did not buy books when I was growing up. Oh, no, I was a Peoples Library loyal customer, checking out as many books as I could at a time. My summers in New Ken meant weekly or more frequent trips to the library, walking up and down the hills and toting my arm loads of books home to devour on the porch. There were no back packs in those days.  We toted whatever we  had to carry.  I guess we had no  real obesity problems because we walked everywhere around our hilly town.  I suppose I was a bookworm. All I know is that I cannot ever remember a time when I did not enjoy reading.

But back to Mockingbird. I loved the writing, the characters and everything about this book. Harper Lee’s Pulitzer had to be for excellent writing, character development and descriptions, and a wonderful story plot. Set in Mississippi in the late 1930’s this book tells the real truth of the treatment of the blacks by the whites through the eyes of Scout, Atticus’ nine year old daughter. Atticus is a single father raising Jem and Scout alone after his wife dies.  His household help is only Calpurnia, their black maid. But Calpurnia has a free hand and treated better than the maids in The Help.  Atticus is an attorney and legislator and is assigned to defend Tom Robinson, a black man accused of raping a white trash girl. One famous Atticus line is, ..”Delete the adjectives and you have the facts…” good legal advice and better life advice. Remove the emotion from a situation and you may be able to adequately analyze for truth in any situation, cloud your analysis with emotion, passion or an attempt at compassion and you will taint your analysis. By now everyone knows the story so I need not repeat it. I will say that rereading it these 37 years later was very worthwhile. This has to be one of the very best books of all time.

The introduction by Gregory Peck who stars as Atticus in the movie is so appropriate, "The southern town of To Kill a Mockingbird reminds me of the California town I grew up in.  The charcters of the novel are like people I knew as a boy.  I think perhaps the great appeal of the novel is that it reminds readers everywhere of a person or a town they have known.  It is to me a universal story--moving, passionate and told with great humor and tenderness."

Defying omens in spite of myself.

I have recognized for a long time that I do should not ignore the providentially predictive omens from “my people” and their direction to me. But today was one of those days when I defied that which I know.

The sun shined off and on making today less winter like than other days. I did not need my heavy coat and could wear only my faux fur vest over a sweat shirt, more than adequate for running in and out of car to places inside. First venture this morning was to the local Farmer’s Market at the community center room, advertised to chase the blahs. I was not expecting farm fresh produce at this time of year, but just wanted to assuage my curiosity. Who knows what would be for sale. Jerry declined to accompany me saying it might be just a flea market or produce from Chile or Mexico. I am pleased to report that was not so, our local farmers do not have the CA crassness; they only sell what they grow.

The offerings were sparse, as expected but included jewelelry, cards, buffalo jerky, honey, canned goods, lots of baked items and apples. I visited with several acquaintances, visited with Esther, a local grower and purchased some wonderful morning glorious muffins which saved me from spending some time baking. I also purchased pints of homemade (and home grown) pickled beets and sauerkraut. I love pickled beets but being the sole consumer of these in this household, there is no need for me to attempt them. The venue was as limited as expected, but worth the diversion.

Yesterday’s missed mall visit beckons me. This was a big mistake. I have no need to shop on weekends and certainly not to visit the mall. I know better, but there I went. It took me a long time to find a parking space, up and down the aisles I drove becoming more and more determined to get into Herberger’s. Once parked and inside I barely browsed the 70% off racks, same junk that has been hanging around the racks all season. I didn’t like, want need it at full or reoccurring sale price and even at 70% off another sale price it was not appealing. Finally I made my way to the Clinique counter the original object of my intention. The PA system had been avidly enticing shoppers to visit the Clinique counter for a free gift with purchase.  Is that a misnomer or what, free after spending $25! I believe it must be extra incentive commission on sales day because I have never seen so many so eager to wait on so few…although the parking lots were full, evidently everyone is browsing, mall walking, in the food court  or who knows where. They are not at this counter which I consider a good thing. After I am approached for the third time by an eager sales girl, I surrender my effort to circle and see the products. I succumb and tell her I want the black honey lipstick and something else that will qualify me for the gift. I do not know what that something else is for sure. I had inventoried my cosmetics and creams, etc. that I occasionally use and found my supplies adequate. Maybe a small bottle of Happy cologne; it smells good and who doesn’t want to spray self with Happy. My overly solicitous salesclerk says in her saddest dramatic voice “Oh No! I am so so so so very very sorry. I just sold the very last tube of Black Honey! We had 25 tubes and they are all gone…” I am truly amazed and respond, “The last tube in existence? Really there will be no more? Ever?” To which she now pouts, “Well I really could not say, but let me show you…” But I beat her at it, “no thanks, that is all I really wanted I can wait or do without, not critical at all,,, Thank you for saving me $$.” I am now free to walk back out to the car and depart, having spent not a cent. This is a good thing, but I feel foolish for wasting an hour and effort at driving to the mall to be amidst a crowd, a task that amuses me not at all.

Made by my grandmother sometime in the  1930's

Sewing by Great Aunt Francie Mroz

The next time I have the urge to do so I will remember today’s experience. Here in retirement mode, I tend to forget lessons or think things will be different? I don’t know but I do know I can amuse myself readily in my own house for free. So I return home and begin to sort out more paperwork that I brought from PA. After spending an hour at that I migrate to rearrange two drawers with my treasures of handmade doilies, and dresser scarves from my aunt, my grandma and my great aunt. This is a productive effort that produces a great feeling of accomplishment. Besides I enjoy the memories and really appreciate the intricate handwork. These were all made with love long ago.   I recognize I am truly blessed to have these things. And I don't have to shop for them.

No broom ride today

Sometimes Mother Nature foils my plans. So it was this afternoon. Very little snow, but blowing wind convinced me to stay home and select a project to complete.  I chose to do some data entry of the financial stuff that has accumulated for nearly a year.

I had planned to drive to Valley View Mall & Herberger’s to pick up my Clinique gift, at the cost of buying I know not what for about $25. Well I had my head set for another tube of that wonderful Black Honey lipstick, the first and only lipstick I have used up in over 20 years. That would not have met the threshold for the gift so I’d have needed something else and I still am pondering what that would have been. Here in retirement land I use so little make up or any of those things that were so essential in career days. But I do love that Black Honey, it looks darker than it is, is very flattering. And well, the bright spring colors on the cosmetic gift bag beckoned.


Besides the gals at Curves this morning were raving about the sales. I was not so interested in a sale rack, because I have seen the items at their best and newest; if those fashions did not entice me then they surely will not now. As I recall there was an array of garb that I would not be caught riding my broom wearing! Besides when my wardrobe primarily consists of cords or jeans and tops, there is not a lot of interest to me out there. Funny thing is I always gravitate to career wear, suits, especially. I donated so many to the women’s clothes closets that I know there are some well dressed gals somewhere out there courtesy of me. I can see the future now, I’ll be 90 years old still browsing the suits and dress pumps. But I was up to a mall walk which surely would have ended up in Starbucks within Barnes and Noble. But never mind, I just did not want to brave the elements. No sympathy here from the other half who posed his tiresome question, “what do you need….” Need, after 40 + years the man should know that need has nothing to do with it. I was just up for an expedition.

Instead, I am happy to report we are now up to date on our Quicken records of all financial data through December 2009. That is a significant accomplishment because 2009 has remained a whirlwind year and things have just had to be set aside until there was time. It was even bugging me that on February 5, 2010  January 2009 still wanted my attention.  Well we are done now and I can reflect and lament on our financial condition. We are ok, better than a lot of folks, but sure wish I‘d have done some things differently, like buy more of some stocks when the price was down and resuce some of those retirement deferrals that  lost so much income.  But that did not happen and spilt milk is neither appetizing nor useful.  Forward and ahead.  

I also spent some time on strategy for a friend running for political office. An unlikely alliance this friend and I but proof once again to keep an open mind. This man is someone I deeply respect. We are almost polar opposites on some issues, but agree on the basics. I appreciate his intelligence, and organizational ability. As a county  political party officer though I must maintian some neutrality..So I am trying to help him in ways that I can and that means applying my fingers to the keyboard and sharing perspectives and directions. I was pleased today that he accepted my advice….well I’m always pleased when anyone accepts my advice, but this is a significant step.

Time to adjourn for a good glass of chardonnay and wipe up the spilt milk before it evaporates and leaves a nasty residue.

Groundhog Day

Today's a day I always remember; if Mom were alive she would be 85 today. Blessedly she was spared further ravages from Alzheimer’s and died suddenly in August 2004. Her birthday was Ground Hog day and if she was in a good mood when we were kids we'd tease her and ask if she saw her shadow. If she was not in a friendly mood we'd keep quiet. We knew better. Mom was in no contest to be our friend, she was the mother and we were the kid and that's the way it was. We knew when not to tread lightly or otherwise.

Long before the movie about it, Ground hog day was an event day for me growing up in western PA. I am surprised at the disdain in some blog comments in today's Wall St. Journal about Punxsutawney Phil, et. al. Who can have that much self righteous anger, animosity toward Phil and groundhogs as weather predictors? Who are these people who find no fun in Phil? What a weird world! Look at him isn't he cute! I still today await Phil's predictions, even though here in WI they have copy cat ground hogs. There is only one Phil descended from the original Punxsutawney Phil.  

I was a Phil friend and defender as far back as I can remember. If I were feeling especially touchy I could sob, "How would you like to be dragged out of bed into the cold with cameras and people looking at you!?" Or I could whine, “He wasn't bothering anybody and look they wake him up!" I made it personal. I could turn on the drama. I made up stories about Phil and his phamily; in these tales, they were either dreading or celebrating their special day and often how they prepared and even plotted to make the best of it. One tale had Mrs. Phil open the door to the burrow early to invite the people in for root beery tea (yes that's root beer tea, another of my creations) before they awakened her husband. Even at a very young age somehow I knew it's all in the attitude even of a ground hog to rise up and enjoy or wallow back and grovel. 

Sure wish I'd written those stories down, products of my fertile imagination, instead of merely  captivating my dolls or friends. I had a few favorite dolls, still with me today, especially Marcella, my talking doll, pictured here, still with her orignal dress. Jinx bought her for me in 1950 for my 6th birthday! A talking doll was really something then. But when it was time for a lesson from Patty Lou, she was polite and all ears. I'd lecture the dolls. I even drew some rough cartoons about Phil and Phamily and how Mrs. Phil loved to dress up and wear diamonds. (I loved diamonds way back then too, sparkles!) One tale had Phil pilfering jewelry from the lady down the hill, like a squirrel or a crow so Mrs. Phil could dress up! I do remember earning a Girl Scout badge for one of my tales of Phil and Phamily...and reading it to our troop. By that time I had to be 12 or so, but I still had my imagination. I thought that was so creative "phamily..." I never had a name for the wife other than Mrs. Phil and there were never any progeny; just the two of them. I even created a musical song and dance routine in their honor, to the tune of, “You are my sunshine....My biggest fans and best audiences besides the dolls were my grandma, grandpap and Aunt Jinx.

These are good memories that have stayed with me a life time. When Steve was young and growing up in CA I tried to interest him in Phil and groundhogs, and my stories. This worked fine while he was a toddler but who ever heard of a ground hog in Sacramento, CA? And as he grew, he lost all interest, considering it was just Mom being weird, and as he grew more it was, "Mother really!" So the stories of and about Phil and Mrs. are buried in the back side of my memory. But once I year I look forward to Phil's descendant's weather prediction; to continue winter or not? Now that we live in MN people know all about Ground hogs so it's a familiar harmless past time.

And by the way Phil saw his shadow, so it's six more weeks of winter......ahead in 2010.

The Help

Finished "The Help" by  Kathryn Stockett, end of January.   Hooray, I read three books in January, not as many as my cousin Carol, but now I am back to speed!  I recommend it as a different read.  I enjoyed this book which takes place in during the Civil Rights movement in the south.  Serendipity  occurs as  we reading this during Martin Luther King celebrations and into black history month.   The novel is primarily told  through the dialect of great characters,  black maids,  who make their living serving the white southern women.   I got a bit tired of some of the dialect, but I have known people who talk this way and so it reminded me of them.  This is a good first novel for the author.  I would have waited to buy this in paperback, but our book club was into it and so once again I did what I said I would not do, bought another book!  And a hardback too!  Well I am glad I did read this best seller while it is there on the top of the charts.  Outspoken, brazen Minny is my favorite maid followed by Abiliene  who is the true heroine.  Skeeter is the white gal, primary character returned home, trying to break into writing to make a living, who pulls this novel together.  I was sad at the ending, which was not a  lives happily ever after, so in that regard it matches life.  It is worth reading..Perhaps because I have known and am/have been a close friend with many blacks "The Help" resonated with me.   It reminded me of old Daisy from Kinloch; she was from the south and I expect had many of these same experiences.  She was a friend of my grandmother's and when I came into the kitchen where they were talking it became very quiet.  Wish I could have heard Daisy's tales.

Listen to what Abilene says about prayer  "'cause that's the way prayer do.  It's like electricity.  It keeps things going..."  Abilene writes her prayers daily in a small notebook.  She is someone everyone seeks out to pray for them, because her prayers have power.  In this way, she reminds me of my friend, Rita.  Her friends say,  "We all  on a party line to God, but you setting right in his ear."

If you know the black southern dialect or the dialect of the working people, you will enjoy the descriptives.    Abiliene describes some words of one upmanship  from her  son Treelore, who is killed by  whites robbing her of her dreams.  "I give him a real simple word and he got to come up with a fancy one like it.  I  say house cat and he say domesticized feline.  I say mixer and he say motorized rotunda.  One day I say Crisco.  He scratch his head.  He just can't believe I done won the game with something as simple as Crisco.   Came to be a secret joke with us, meaning, something you can't dress up no matter how you try...." 

The villain of the novel is Miss Hilly, the white woman who fancies herself superior to everyone.  We see this with her treatment of Skeeter one of her long time friends.  It takes a Minny to  overcome her long reach, but not before she tries to destroy Minnie too.

After reading this I have pulled my old copy of To Kill a Mockingbird from my shelf.  I am  now rereading it and enjoying the writing.