We arrived home yesterday about 5:00PM after a successful two day drive. Jerry was feeling exceptionally brave and steered the RV home towing the truck through the Chicago loop. We always avoid that part of the country and prefer to go another 60 miles or so out of our way. But after 5 years he decided to give it a try. Likely it will be many more years before we even consider that loop again. Even if it did give me a view of the Chicago Polish Museum, reportedly something that entices those of us of that special ethnicity. The loop cost us about $48 in tolls. I guess we now own a piece of Chicago. At one toll booth, the toll taker-man asked, "Are you towing the truck?" To which Jerry said, "No it's pushing me!" The tollman laughed and commented that was a good one but that he had no discounts for wise guys. I guess not many jokes are shared along the Chicago loop toll way!
We saw many of those tiny cars of the future--the Obsama prototypes, you know the kind that people wear! I think anyone who drives one of those sewing machine sized excuses for a vehicle in heavy traffic is either very brave or nuts!
The pilot did better than the navigator through the loop. She would have begun to chew her fingernails, something she's never done in her life, but she assuaged herself by fondling her blackberry brick breaker game!
But here we are in beautiful homeland. And the roses have not yet bloomed nor have the peonies. Saved their blooms for me to see and I so appreciate that. Tomorrow will bring a ton of mail which has been held at the post office.
I am so happy to be back home again! Jerry is too and looking forward to riding his mower around the grass. Kentucky fried chicken never tasted as good as it did last night. Jerry's cousin and friend called and offered to get it and bring to the house. That was the best idea we'd heard all day! We four huddled around our tiny kitchen table and finished off the bucket. Last night I slept wonderfully in our own bed. And this evening after dinner I pedaled around on my bike. Tomorrow will see this body back at Curves. I missed my work out routine and am sure my body will protest a bit as it reacquaints itself with fitness.
There are the daily phone calls I will make to my Uncle. By the way, I figured it out--he is 91 not 90. When anyone asks him he claims to be in his 80's but readily gives his correct birthday--March 21, 1918! To which I said one day, "Well Uncle Carl you are 91! Not 90!" He replied, "well you're the one who kept saying I'm 90 I knew I wasn't 90." He still has not said he's 91 but he knows he's not 90. Well he is quite the character when he has his clarity and wits about him.
I pray that my aunt will pass along peacefully as she would prefer. To say she is not in good health is an understatement. She's 87, in a SNF, stage 4 lung cancer, metastasized from colon cancer five years ago, so they say, is somewhat alert, cannot get out of bed alone, weighs only 67 pounds, must wear diapers, and at times coughs up blood! Not the life she deserves and not the death she deserves. She's ready to be "taken home" and who knows why she still is here in this valley of tears we call life.
More later on the good things that happened while we were in PA. But I could not wait to get my fingers back flying across the keys at the computer. I suppose one could say I have keyboard addiction. Withdrawal is hell! Blackberry is my on the road pal, but thumb texting on it's teeny keys goes only so far.
I created this blog to record our RV trips and ;morphed into life in our retirement lane and telling my tales of life. Now my tales of life are on widowhood, my new and probably my last phase of l I have migrated to Facebook where I communicate daily, instantly with family/friends all over. I write here sometimes. COPYWRIGHT NOTICE: All photos, stories, writings on this blog are the property of myself, Patricia Morrison and may not be used, copied, without my permission most often freely given.
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Why me--Well why not You!
Here we be in PA on a geriatric, whistle stop-merry-go-round. Monday, I had both "kids" 87 year old aunt, and 90 year old uncle to the doctor. One look at her and the doctor said, "to the hospital!" OK so now I have one to deal with getting social services, meals on wheels, things fixed, etc...my 90 year old Uncle Carl. He's amenable to many things but not to being told what to do when by women, let alone a "bunch of women" as happened yesterday at this home! Me, social worker, personal care assistant--all women we three. Fortunately they did send a male physical therapist; I'd alerted them that he really really prefers male companionship! But at least we are on a roll. One day at a time. Looks like we will not make it to the Carolinas again this year. Darn and double darn!
This is my first computer access. Local library. So here goes, a funny tale from yesterday. I am ascribing to the old saying, if it will be funny some day it has to be funny today. Uncle Carl (90 yrs. old) is very amenable to most things. And frankly he had been staying over at his sisters--my aunt (87 year old.)who could barely care for herself let alone him too. What a joke that was. So he's happy to be back in his own home where he can pull weeds, putter, etc. But yesterday while talking with the physical therapist, I noticed a brown animal about big as a beaver in his front yard. "What's that?" Uncle Carl raises up quickly to see and says a wood chuck, good old PA ground hog! Then he and the PT begin to discuss ground hogs. And Carl adds, "we used to eat them" I guess so because he explained that he and my grandfather would dig them out of their burrows, haunts or whatever things the ground hogs descend into. Grandpap was a coal miner so I guess h3 knew how to un-ground the ground hogs. I had not heard this tale of eating woodchuck before so I asked in innocence, which Carl thought strange, "Well what do they taste like?" "Taste like Ground hog!" he replies looking at me like I'm a brick short of a load. (Like who really is partially demented here?) I said, "no, I mean do they taste like chicken or what?" With that he has reached the end of the afternoon tolerance for this niece whom he tells, "I already told you they taste like ground hog why are you talking about chickens?" Hearing this the PT almost falls down laughing. You had to be there to hear and see it.
Here I am doing all the legal things, etc. and here's Carl just tolerating me. The other day clearing piles and stacks of junk, papers, old boxes from tea bags he'd accumulated on his tables & shelves ,he looked at me and said, "well I just don't have time to do this." To which I replied, "well that's why we are getting help for you." A few more words exchanged and he is at the puzzled stage with me again, "when did you say you are going back to MN?" I think he's thinking he won't be so bothered once I leave town. I looked at him in the midst of a clearing and sorting frenzy and he was laughing at me. He thinks too everything is funny and cautions me,"Don't get old! It's a bitch!" To which I say, "we get older or deader."
At least he has a sense of humor. My aunt has become very down, worn out and nothing is funny. So we await further diagnosis and hope for the best.
As I said on Facebook, "Why me Lord?" And the God I know so well, has responded "Well why not you!"
Mother's Day was a bit tough for me--first year without Steve. Not that he fussed much about it, but there's a big gap left when you lose your adult son. Had a lovely email and text from granddaughter and daughter in law. That was lovely. Still, missed, that "Hi mom, just checking in." Ah well. I attended Sunday service at a small country type Methodist church here, Millerstown. A lovely service where those who lost their mothers got to stand and be remembered with white roses and those who still have a mother received red roses. Then the minister had all who had lost a child stand to have a yellow rose. I got those tears for a bit.
Well I must sign off and get back to the laundry and then we must get over to Carl's. By the way we had the best pizza last night--from Capris (sp?) here in Natrona Hts. Yummy real Italian. No speeka much Inglish there. The best.
This is my first computer access. Local library. So here goes, a funny tale from yesterday. I am ascribing to the old saying, if it will be funny some day it has to be funny today. Uncle Carl (90 yrs. old) is very amenable to most things. And frankly he had been staying over at his sisters--my aunt (87 year old.)who could barely care for herself let alone him too. What a joke that was. So he's happy to be back in his own home where he can pull weeds, putter, etc. But yesterday while talking with the physical therapist, I noticed a brown animal about big as a beaver in his front yard. "What's that?" Uncle Carl raises up quickly to see and says a wood chuck, good old PA ground hog! Then he and the PT begin to discuss ground hogs. And Carl adds, "we used to eat them" I guess so because he explained that he and my grandfather would dig them out of their burrows, haunts or whatever things the ground hogs descend into. Grandpap was a coal miner so I guess h3 knew how to un-ground the ground hogs. I had not heard this tale of eating woodchuck before so I asked in innocence, which Carl thought strange, "Well what do they taste like?" "Taste like Ground hog!" he replies looking at me like I'm a brick short of a load. (Like who really is partially demented here?) I said, "no, I mean do they taste like chicken or what?" With that he has reached the end of the afternoon tolerance for this niece whom he tells, "I already told you they taste like ground hog why are you talking about chickens?" Hearing this the PT almost falls down laughing. You had to be there to hear and see it.
Here I am doing all the legal things, etc. and here's Carl just tolerating me. The other day clearing piles and stacks of junk, papers, old boxes from tea bags he'd accumulated on his tables & shelves ,he looked at me and said, "well I just don't have time to do this." To which I replied, "well that's why we are getting help for you." A few more words exchanged and he is at the puzzled stage with me again, "when did you say you are going back to MN?" I think he's thinking he won't be so bothered once I leave town. I looked at him in the midst of a clearing and sorting frenzy and he was laughing at me. He thinks too everything is funny and cautions me,"Don't get old! It's a bitch!" To which I say, "we get older or deader."
At least he has a sense of humor. My aunt has become very down, worn out and nothing is funny. So we await further diagnosis and hope for the best.
As I said on Facebook, "Why me Lord?" And the God I know so well, has responded "Well why not you!"
Mother's Day was a bit tough for me--first year without Steve. Not that he fussed much about it, but there's a big gap left when you lose your adult son. Had a lovely email and text from granddaughter and daughter in law. That was lovely. Still, missed, that "Hi mom, just checking in." Ah well. I attended Sunday service at a small country type Methodist church here, Millerstown. A lovely service where those who lost their mothers got to stand and be remembered with white roses and those who still have a mother received red roses. Then the minister had all who had lost a child stand to have a yellow rose. I got those tears for a bit.
Well I must sign off and get back to the laundry and then we must get over to Carl's. By the way we had the best pizza last night--from Capris (sp?) here in Natrona Hts. Yummy real Italian. No speeka much Inglish there. The best.
Saturday, May 2, 2009
The Shack
"The Shack" by Wm. Paul Young has earned a place on my keeper book shelf. I avoided this book as it climbed the best seller charts because I thought it was just another mystery or a new age read and I have plenty of good mysteries still accumulating dust on my pending reading shelves. See it's gone beyond one shelf of to reads..that's the trouble with being a bookworm! Never a sale to pass up and always something good to pick up! But one day this past winter I relented in Barnes & Noble and picked up The Shack. I am so glad I did.
My friend Sandy,(in CA) told me that her church group were all raving about The Shack. She has a good mixture of friends there who read, think and discuss. So my curiosity got to me. I read this book in about a week and the reason it took so long was that I kept going back and rereading passages. No, it's not a retention or attention span issue, it's wanting to read that again and again. It is only 252 pages and I would have devoured it in a couple evenings but savoring the writing seemed more appropriate. It is that nicely written and I wanted to absorb some of these passages. My copy is now extremely highlighted and marked up. That's my bad habit with books, you know, and the reason I can't borrow from our wonderful little library.
The story line isn't all that appealing---a young girl, Missy, is abducted and killed while out camping with her dad and siblings. The family experiences tremendous grief over this. The writing outdoes the plot of The Shack. Narrated as through the father, Mackkenzie Allen Phillips, or Mack this is a personal expression of grief and journey and how to or not move on. I don't want to give away the story in entirety so as not to spoil it for those of you who might now pick up the book. This is a book I would give as a gift to people. It's one I heartily recommend to anyone who can open mindedly read these concepts.
Here, I'll share a couple passages--
pg. 136..."Rumors of glory are often hidden inside what many consider myths and tales..." spoken by Sarayu, the Holy Spirit presence.
pgs 136-137.. Sarayu and Mack discuss what is good and what is bad..."When something happens to you, how do you determine whether it is good or evil?"...""I'm not sure I have any logical ground for deciding what is actually good or evil, except how something or someone affects me." .."Then it is you who determines good and evil. You become the judge....that which you determine to be good will change over time and circumstances. And then, beyond that there are billions of you, each determining what is good and evil..."
pg. 147....Here Jesus and Mack are discussing love and free will--you know that thing given to us humans that has been messing with us since the Garden of Eden. "Have you noticed that even though you call me Lord and King that I have never acted in that capacity with you?....To force my will on you...is exactly what love does not do. Genuine relationships are marked by submission even when you choices are not helpful or healthy....Submission is not about authority and it is not obedience. It is all about relationships of love and respect."
Pg 149... By choosing to declare what's good and evil you seek to determine your own destiny. It was this turning that has caused so much pain."
pg. 156..."If a rainbow makes a sound, or a flower as it grows, that was the sound of her laughter. It was a shower of light,,,," Mack's description of the Holy Spirit.
pg. 230..."Tears can be healing waters and a stream of joy." spoken to Mack by the Lord.
Mack sets off alone on a journey back to the scene of the crime while his wife and the other children are off to visit relatives. What happens to Mack on this journey is the gist of this spiritual book. He does encounter the Lord and Jesus and the Holy Spirit. Only perhaps not as most people could imagine. Me, though, I can imagine anything...once while teaching Sunday school a little girl asked, "What if God looks like a big mouse?" I laughed and said, "well what if and why not.?" The kids were about 9 years old in that class and there was a lively "what if God looks like a....", thoughts ran the gamut from mouse to Super Dog, to wild bear, to chicken! I've always wondered what does God really resemble; are we in for a surprise the other side? We read about the experience of light, love, warmth. We Christians have our Bible photos and thoughts but is Spirit really like that? Is Jesus really as we picture--it was in another part of the world where the folks are much darker complected. They were nomads.
I understand why there may be some religious (church)controversy/objection about The Shack . It is not a book that promotes churches or religion per se, but it does instill spirituality and the belief in our Christian trinity, but maybe not just as the only path.
When Mack questions how evil can happen to an Innocent little girl,(I have wondered about this all my life and where's God then?) the dialogue bears reading and rereading. pg 175 & on."she was never alone. We never left her, not for one instant....Did she know you were there?...Not at first the fear was overwhelming and she was in shock. It took hours..."
My very favorite passage if I had to choose just one in The Shack is about forgiveness. We hear forgiveness preached and discussed all the time. I have had many experiences in my lifetime that have caused me to ponder it intensely. I've heard forgive and forget and I believe they are two different things--not joined together. I have read books about forgiveness and I know it frees the one who forgives. I have never felt that forgiveness means we go right back to square 1 and reestablish a relationship with the person we've forgiven. The person may be long gone from our lives. The person may be dead and we may be grateful for that. Sometimes forgiveness is just that we move on in our own minds. But we remember and we take the advice, "when people show you who they are, believe them the first time." My friend, Sandy thinks that as long as there is anger there cannot be forgiveness, and I disagree with that. Forgiveness is summarized, Pages 226-230 in a discussion between Mack and God ...."Forgiveness is Not about forgetting...It is about letting go of another person's throat......Forgiveness does not establish relationship....Unless people speak the truth about what they have done and change their minds and behavior, a relationship of trust is not possible......When you forgive someone you release him from judgment, but without true change, no real relationship can be established...So forgiveness does not require me to pretend what he did never happened? ****Forgiveness in no way requires that you trust the one you forgive...forgiveness does not excuse anything***..." The discussion is that forgiveness requires repentance from the other side and a change in the behavior, not acceptance of the same bad stuff. Also the discussion covers anger as a very approroiate response to wrong, to evil, to what was done. Anger is appropriate! Hallelujiah! What a concept! In the Bible, even Jesus became angry. One can forgive without a relationship being reestablished with the offender to move on, to release themselves. We learn here that a bridge of reconciliation may lead to fully restored trust, but only when the other changes!
At the end of the book the writer asks that we share this book, published by windblown media. I think it might have been on a shoestring budget and has astounded the author with overwhelming success. It asks that we write review and I thought, they read my mind, That's what I've started to do on this blog, both to remind me and to let you know what's on the reading nightstand now. They have a website which I've not yet checked out, but share here with you, it is The Missy Project, www.theshackbook.com
Saturday, April 25, 2009
My new pink look & furniture moving limitations
Just messing with this blog today and decided to trade my dots for spring pink....Not sure how long I'll stick with this pink, but here is my new look. Let me know what you think, I know you will.
This is similar to moving around furniture--something I like to do and something which is now nearly impossible. Our TVs dominate in the downstairs den/theater/bar room and in the upstairs living room because of the cable hook ups, etc.
At least in Newcastle, Ca I could change the living room at times, usually Christmas was my big opportunity. We never had the humongous big screen TV there, but slowly with the satellite dish attachments I found myself prohibited from moving the TV. Still I could rearrange couch and chairs. Neither Jerry nor Steve ever appreciated my efforts at moving furniture. They would each take off for parts unknown to avoid my redecorating. They said they could tell when they would see me standing looking at furniture that I was about to rearrange. Our Siamese cat particularly hated it when I moved things around and would race around the house calling out in a screech, as though alerting I don't know whom "Watch out! Hear ye all!She's at it again!" She would cross her blue eyes and scowl at me for days after I'd rearranged anything.
I used to be able to shove any piece of furniture around a big room. Here, I have met my limitations with some of our humongous furniture that will not move, no way no how. Our dining room set for one is not to be rearranged. Our bedroom is possible but Jerry has repeatedly told me not to even think of it and since I cannot manage that bed and dresser alone, it's off limits. The guest bedroom doesn't appeal to my need to rearrange. Though there too, the queen size bed would be a challenge. Our downstairs TV console takes up an entire wall, accommodates the biggest screen TV, was custom built by Jerry and is going no where. (short shot of this scene above)The huge leather couch downstairs is a bear to move but I have shifted it to an angle at times. The upstairs living room (photo of floral sofa & side chair) decor could be adjusted but there is the trouble of the cable TV. Dang, I never wanted a TV in that room anyway and now it dictates and limits my decorating schemes. I had pictured a formal room where there would only be pleasantries of conversation--I live in a fantasy world sometimes. The reality is we have TVs all over the house; and for someone who hardly ever watched it I find things to turn on in retirement. Well with the hundreds of channels on cable, there's bound to be something.
In the downstairs library/study/computer room I'm limited by the big oak solid heavy computer desk that fit just so into a nook. So it goes nowhere and then again there's the DLS hook up, etc, also through our TV/cable company.
A couple years ago after much looking we bought an immense coffee table with leather top and four mini stools that slide underneath the table for downstairs. Oh it was just the ticket. People could sit on those stools, best of all the stools have room for storing things in them as the lids/seats lift off. I always have things to put in places and those, well afghans, throws, things to wrap oneself up in while vegging out in front of the TV. Well, it was just the perfect table for our big sofa. But somehow during the remodel we shifted that coffee table into the library and there it stays.(see it in action near some of the book cases in the photo)I have made great use of it as my design/cutting table to cut out and lay out sewing projects or other crafty efforts. Three of the mini stools are in the other room with the sofa so folks can put their feet up or use them as end tables, or whatever. Our two leather recliners downstairs are our favorite chairs to retreat to at days end. Mostly both are positioned where we best like them; and since mostly it's us two here we should be where we want to be for seating.
Which brings up another thing--Jerry's corner(photo where the Olympia beer mirror hangs). He has his dedicated corner here just like he did in CA. From that corner nothing is to be touched, not ever, never. Like I said, I know my limitations. But before our company arrived this month I mentioned that if I could move his chair out of his corner we could rearrange the couch, etc. He would not even discuss this intelligently or otherwise. He just gave me that look. End of no discussion. He claims that in 5,000 sq. ft. he only wants one corner. That's not exactly true--he has his own work out room too! Of course it is the only unfinished room in our basement, but what the heck! And he does have that huge house down the hill where the motor home lives and the attached garage--what more does he want!
Now we did rearrange the downstairs bedroom when grand daughter was coming to visit and the upstairs bedrooms were taken by other family. That involved moving the daybed and moving my nordic trac out of that room and tidying up from my projects in progress which can usually happily hide there in any state of disarray, undisturbed until I get the urge or time to work further on them. You can see the floral daybed photo of this room.
Well suffice it that I can't do much furniture rearranging so my creative streak has to come out other ways--like on this blog...that's why we are now in the pink! But looking at the way these photos played on on my blog, I need to do some rearranging...but not right now. Bye.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Reading Update
Continuing with my commitment to include my books read here for my own later use and your entertainment---
"Partners in Power The Clintons and Their America" by Roger Morris. I picked this up at a library book sale somewhere on our travels last year and just got around to it. Published in 1996 I don't know how I overlooked this for so many years. A great read! Just the kind of reading I enjoy--politics, history and true life stories. Lots of information, mostly known now about Bill & Hillary Clinton and their rise to power from early times in Arkansas. Talk about some shenanigans! They pulled it all off! Bill's philanderings are almost described as acceptable and surely expected because of the very broken family life he had. Although Bill Clinton avoids alcoholic beverages fearing alcoholism as his father and step father suffered, there is speculation if his indulgence with cocaine. Interesting that Bill Clinton's rise was absolutely with the backing and support of Hillary. The book has chapters on each of their lives and families preceding their move to higher education. I laughed out loud at Hillary's punching a neighbor boy, bloodying his nose and winning the fight growing up. She is a ruthless woman! Bill Clinton's Rhodes scholarship was a breezy sleaze and reading this removed my respect for the mystique of a Rhodes scholar. Bill's easy ability to lie is well documented and why we can remember him as Slick Willy. Hillary's snobbish sense of entitlement is well known now too but reading Morris' description of her career as an attorney, the entwinement with the McDougals, her striking it rich on marginal investment and her makeovers is intriguing. This book covers in depth, their rise to power, which again makes me contemplate how in the world do we elect people in this country? It also has a fascinating history of political changes, turmoil and background including the growth and overtaking of Congress and DC by lobbyists. I have not read any other of Roger Morris work, but would in a minute. I don't believe he has written after this book at least I've not found later works on Google. This is a keeper in my library, political and history.
The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion. I read this book in two nights. Written about her journey in life processing grief the year following the death of her husband and the near death of her daughter, Joan has written with translucent honesty. I could so relate to may of her feelings. It was a timely read for me. It was a book I'd wondered about before and likely dismissed as too morose or too down, but with Steve's death I wanted to read this. "People who have recently lost someone have a certain look, recognizable maybe only to those who have seen that look on their own faces.......These people who have lost someone look naked because they think themselves invisible.. " That sure struck with me. Lots of truth in here and not answers but just one remarkable story of moving through grief and moving on in life. "Time is the school in which we learn." attributed to Delmore Schwartz leads into the discussion of cognitive deficits which can be associated with grief as well as stress. Fascinating. "I know why we try to keep the dead alive. We keep them alive in order to keep them with us." Yes, I know that, but further she writes, "..we must relinquish the dead, let them go, keep them dead....Knowing this does not make it any easier."
I am now reading "The Shack" and will tell about it when I'm done which should be very soon. I would almost give up working outside to finishing this book about a man's journey to/with/near/around God and his coping with his Great Sadness after his daughter is abducted. I did not know this was such a heart rending religious book when I picked it up. More to come on it--it will be a keeper.
"Partners in Power The Clintons and Their America" by Roger Morris. I picked this up at a library book sale somewhere on our travels last year and just got around to it. Published in 1996 I don't know how I overlooked this for so many years. A great read! Just the kind of reading I enjoy--politics, history and true life stories. Lots of information, mostly known now about Bill & Hillary Clinton and their rise to power from early times in Arkansas. Talk about some shenanigans! They pulled it all off! Bill's philanderings are almost described as acceptable and surely expected because of the very broken family life he had. Although Bill Clinton avoids alcoholic beverages fearing alcoholism as his father and step father suffered, there is speculation if his indulgence with cocaine. Interesting that Bill Clinton's rise was absolutely with the backing and support of Hillary. The book has chapters on each of their lives and families preceding their move to higher education. I laughed out loud at Hillary's punching a neighbor boy, bloodying his nose and winning the fight growing up. She is a ruthless woman! Bill Clinton's Rhodes scholarship was a breezy sleaze and reading this removed my respect for the mystique of a Rhodes scholar. Bill's easy ability to lie is well documented and why we can remember him as Slick Willy. Hillary's snobbish sense of entitlement is well known now too but reading Morris' description of her career as an attorney, the entwinement with the McDougals, her striking it rich on marginal investment and her makeovers is intriguing. This book covers in depth, their rise to power, which again makes me contemplate how in the world do we elect people in this country? It also has a fascinating history of political changes, turmoil and background including the growth and overtaking of Congress and DC by lobbyists. I have not read any other of Roger Morris work, but would in a minute. I don't believe he has written after this book at least I've not found later works on Google. This is a keeper in my library, political and history.
The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion. I read this book in two nights. Written about her journey in life processing grief the year following the death of her husband and the near death of her daughter, Joan has written with translucent honesty. I could so relate to may of her feelings. It was a timely read for me. It was a book I'd wondered about before and likely dismissed as too morose or too down, but with Steve's death I wanted to read this. "People who have recently lost someone have a certain look, recognizable maybe only to those who have seen that look on their own faces.......These people who have lost someone look naked because they think themselves invisible.. " That sure struck with me. Lots of truth in here and not answers but just one remarkable story of moving through grief and moving on in life. "Time is the school in which we learn." attributed to Delmore Schwartz leads into the discussion of cognitive deficits which can be associated with grief as well as stress. Fascinating. "I know why we try to keep the dead alive. We keep them alive in order to keep them with us." Yes, I know that, but further she writes, "..we must relinquish the dead, let them go, keep them dead....Knowing this does not make it any easier."
I am now reading "The Shack" and will tell about it when I'm done which should be very soon. I would almost give up working outside to finishing this book about a man's journey to/with/near/around God and his coping with his Great Sadness after his daughter is abducted. I did not know this was such a heart rending religious book when I picked it up. More to come on it--it will be a keeper.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Our tea parties
Our Tea Parties
Here in our city of La Crescent, population of 5,000 we had two tea parties. The first on Monday, April 13 inside at the Community Center where about 60 people attended. We collected canned foods for our local food panry at this event to keep with the MN tradition of food for all!
I described this first one in my blog/post to the Tom Sullivan Show where I am an avid part of his Listener's Club. We followed Tom in CA and really missed him in MN. Used to catch him on the computer live stream now and then. But over a year ago while in OK, we picked him up on Fox Talk on the satellite radio. That happened to be his first day on the air; he's moved to New York and hosts on Fox Talk daily from 2:00--5:00PM, our central standard time. That day, I called and was his last caller of the day. We enjoy satellite radio in the motor home and in my GMC Envoy. But with the ability to hear Tom daily, Jerry bought a home adapter to keep up with Tom.
So back to the tea parties....in part I posted to Tom who had posed the question, "What is happening to our country?" "...We've been talking about this very subject . I grew up without a father who was killed in WWII months before my birth; I don't think his life was given to have our liberties taken away by this regime. My hubby was 10 years in the Air force--he says "I did not serve my country to see it come to this!" We had a pre- -Tea Party here in la Crescent, MN organized by a friend who's a candidate for State Senate seat next year...About 60 attended for the 2 hours, not bad for a hamlet of 5,000. We served Free Tea. And here's the brilliance--Gave out free booklets of the Constitution--people scooped those up like candy. We advised they begin to read the Constitution and see just how bad things are. I talked to one man whom I'd met earlier in the year at a caucus--he said he could no longer just sit back. Now he knows he must get involved. I told him, "see what happens when we don't pay attention..."He agreed but said he never expected this." Thought he was insulated here in the Midwest.
By the way, when do you think the last time was most folks read the Constitution?"
To my delight Tom picked up my writings and read it all on the air just as soon as I finished posting, cool! So we had national coverage of our first La Crescent tea party! Tom endorsed the idea of giving out copies of the Constitution--most people don't know how simple and straightforward it is. Read up all!
Yesterday April 15 there was another at the Veterans park. This was fitting because yesterday Homeland Security made news by targeting our veterans returning from foreign lands of being potential right wing extremists and to be watched like terrorists. Disgusting beyond belief!
Mary & Frank Ludwig (He's a professor at Viterbo college in La Crosse) made up lots of games for the kids and carried a colonial, Revolutionary War theme. Mary had a Joe the Plumber game with a plunger and toilet ball--that was quite popular. Joe the Plumber is a hero here. Mary & some of her kids read many patriotic quotes; they did the same reading Monday night at our indoor tea party. I have asked her to present it at a Legion meeting and she has agreed. Their children are getting a real sense of history. It was interesting to watch the local kids get interested in the historic theme. Yesterday we had many young families on a gorgeous spring day in the park, on their way home from work. When the local newspaper took a photo of the children with the home made kites, Jerry suggested thy title it, "Here are the tax payers of the future ...already laden with the Messiah's debt" Doubt they will use that caption though...
Frank, who is seated in the one photo told everyone yesterday that we are all now subversives for attending the tea parties! Their oldest son in the revolutionary tri-corner hat worked the younger boys through drills using sticks as rifles....perhaps preparing them for the world ahead.
Monday, April 13, 2009
Walter Williams paragraph and a Saharan quote
I don't usually cut and paste these things, but today on our way to our local Tea (Taxed Enough Already) Party I checked my emails. This came through on the Patriot Post to which I subscribe. Worth reading.
"Most of our nation's great problems, including our economic problems, have as their root decaying moral values. Whether we have the stomach to own up to it or not, we have become an immoral people left with little more than the pretense of morality. ... Do you believe that it is moral and just for one person to be forcibly used to serve the purposes of another? And, if that person does not peaceably submit to being so used, do you believe that there should be the initiation of some kind of force against him? Neither question is complex and can be answered by either a yes or no. For me the answer is no to both questions but I bet that your average college professor, politician or minister would not give a simple yes or no response. They would be evasive and probably say that it all depends. ...[That] is because they are sly enough to know that either answer would be troublesome for their agenda. A yes answer would put them firmly in the position of supporting some of mankind's most horrible injustices such as slavery. After all, what is slavery but the forcible use of one person to serve the purposes of another? A no answer would put them on the spot as well because that would mean they would have to come out against taking the earnings of one American to give to another in the forms of farm and business handouts, Medicare, Medicaid, food stamps and thousands of similar programs that account for more than two-thirds of the federal budget. There is neither moral justification nor constitutional authority for what amounts to legalized theft. This is not an argument against paying taxes. We all have a moral obligation to pay our share of the constitutionally mandated and enumerated functions of the federal government. ...[But] now that the U.S. Congress has established the principle that one American has a right to live at the expense of another American, it no longer pays to be moral." --George Mason University economics professor Walter E. Williams
And to close it,,,,,here is exactly the way I think of government...whatever it gets it will screw up....."If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in five years there'd be a shortage of sand." --Nobel prize-winning economist Milton Friedman (1912-2006)
"Most of our nation's great problems, including our economic problems, have as their root decaying moral values. Whether we have the stomach to own up to it or not, we have become an immoral people left with little more than the pretense of morality. ... Do you believe that it is moral and just for one person to be forcibly used to serve the purposes of another? And, if that person does not peaceably submit to being so used, do you believe that there should be the initiation of some kind of force against him? Neither question is complex and can be answered by either a yes or no. For me the answer is no to both questions but I bet that your average college professor, politician or minister would not give a simple yes or no response. They would be evasive and probably say that it all depends. ...[That] is because they are sly enough to know that either answer would be troublesome for their agenda. A yes answer would put them firmly in the position of supporting some of mankind's most horrible injustices such as slavery. After all, what is slavery but the forcible use of one person to serve the purposes of another? A no answer would put them on the spot as well because that would mean they would have to come out against taking the earnings of one American to give to another in the forms of farm and business handouts, Medicare, Medicaid, food stamps and thousands of similar programs that account for more than two-thirds of the federal budget. There is neither moral justification nor constitutional authority for what amounts to legalized theft. This is not an argument against paying taxes. We all have a moral obligation to pay our share of the constitutionally mandated and enumerated functions of the federal government. ...[But] now that the U.S. Congress has established the principle that one American has a right to live at the expense of another American, it no longer pays to be moral." --George Mason University economics professor Walter E. Williams
And to close it,,,,,here is exactly the way I think of government...whatever it gets it will screw up....."If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in five years there'd be a shortage of sand." --Nobel prize-winning economist Milton Friedman (1912-2006)
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Consider the lowly phone booth
Think about it, living in our world of cell phones, texting, tele-communications, Twitter and Facebook, when was the last time you saw a phone booth? Well we have one right in downtown La Crescent, right across from the post office and outside our local phone company office. I've never noticed it, but while CA grand daughter Janine was visiting this past week, it caught her attention. "Grandma, what's that little building on the sidewalk?" To which, I could reply, "Huh", really unaware of what she was talking about.
So we drove by the post office on our way to one of our shopping expeditions. "Oh, that's a Phone booth!" She said, "A what?" I began to explain pay phones and phone booths. She was so fascinated at her young age of 18, that we had to visit it and take her picture to post on her i-phone or whatever that magic device she carries.
Really here is a young lady, in her first year of college who knows nothing of pay phones and certainly not of phone booths. How will she ever understand the comedy of Maxwell Smart? How will she ever get the jokes about Superman changing in the phone booth? We have now an upcoming generation deprived of such experience. While we progress in technology and other rapid changes in our society consider the lowly phone booth. No more college pranks stuffing it full of as many of us as we could.
We returned home to explain this phenomena to our other family guests including a 10 year old niece from CA, Sophia who is quite advanced and well read. Certainly she had heard of phone booths. And where? In Harry Potter! But her parents took her by the same phone booth from which she called our house just to be able to say she used a pay phone booth--another part of disappearing America.
When we visit Decatur, Indiana we go to Arnolds's, a local diner 50's style, which has survived from the 50's and still serves the greasy burger, real Cherry cokes and thick malts. We remember those times and can experience them in places like that. Not a faux flip to the 50's but a real survivor of the ages.
So many things are changing and so much we roll along with taking no notice until we engage with the younger up and coming generation and find ourselves explaining what's become obsolete in society. They can no more imagine pay phones and life without i-pods, cells, texting than they could imagine life without TV. While we grew up in the midst of phenomenal changes, we studied history and knew of such things as horse and carriage pre-automobile. Today without the study of history only by visiting Grandpa & Grandma in the Heartland will they know some of what they might otherwise miss.
Friday, April 3, 2009
Stimulated
Today my monthly retirement remittance advice arrived....it seems I've been stimulated courtesy of Ob(s)ama & Co. Jerry had checked our direct deposit the other day and said, "I think you got a raise." I thought that curious because I know I get no cost of living raise until May. But I went on my merry way paying not other attention. Until today when the remittance copy came in the mail.
I'd wondered how us retirees were going to receive our stimulus. I believed we would get good old fashioned Polish "Huvno" (sp?) Actually I've been using the term, Polish Huvno, a lot ever since the inauguration of the socialist Muslim who now is in the White house. But, lo there it is, nearly an $70 monthly increase with a decreased amount in federal income tax withholding.
Our accountant told us that "they" would adjust the federal withholding amounts for wage earners to give the tantamount stimuli we have all read about. Ob(s)ama's further attempt to run our country into socialism is alive and well. I've read all about the $8-$13 per week folks were to benefit by. So since I have a substantial amount withheld from my retirement check to cover the heinous federal income taxes that we owe each year, I wondered if I would benefit the same way. It seems I have. My monthly net increase is about $68.
What bothers me is, while they stimulate those of us who must always pay federal income taxes, what happens at the end of the year? I mean when we calculate the amount we owe the government will the tax tables be reduced by the amount of these stimuli? Will we owe the feds more at the end of the year by this artificial stimuli through the year, making us think we have additional $ to spend when we do not? There has been no mention of a tax cut for us poor jerks.
Then again maybe this is a good thing--after all if most of us taxpaying Americans are behind on federal income taxes in 2010 for 2009, courtesy of the Ob(s)ama stimuli, will that qualify us for appointments as Secretary of Treasury? I feel that after my career I'd certainly qualify for Secretary of Health and Human Services. The Ob(s)ama appointees seem to have one unifying thread, none of them pay their income taxes on time or "appropriately."
Perhaps in addition to this faux-stimulation this is now an employment recruitment effort. Think of it, what better way to change DC than to get the likes of you and me to be the new appointees. I dare say we could do as good or better than Tiny Tim of the Treasury or Kathleen Sibelius of Health and Human Services. Maybe this is the other side of the coin, give them money to spend with a false assurance that it is theirs and then months later when they don't even recall how they've spent their $$, whack them with a tax bill. When they can't pay those income tax levies, seize them and transport them to DC to work as bureaucrats for the likes of the teleprompters.
Aaahh who said Ayn Rand or George Orwell wrote fiction? It may have been predictive. We are living in Gault's world indeed!
I'd wondered how us retirees were going to receive our stimulus. I believed we would get good old fashioned Polish "Huvno" (sp?) Actually I've been using the term, Polish Huvno, a lot ever since the inauguration of the socialist Muslim who now is in the White house. But, lo there it is, nearly an $70 monthly increase with a decreased amount in federal income tax withholding.
Our accountant told us that "they" would adjust the federal withholding amounts for wage earners to give the tantamount stimuli we have all read about. Ob(s)ama's further attempt to run our country into socialism is alive and well. I've read all about the $8-$13 per week folks were to benefit by. So since I have a substantial amount withheld from my retirement check to cover the heinous federal income taxes that we owe each year, I wondered if I would benefit the same way. It seems I have. My monthly net increase is about $68.
What bothers me is, while they stimulate those of us who must always pay federal income taxes, what happens at the end of the year? I mean when we calculate the amount we owe the government will the tax tables be reduced by the amount of these stimuli? Will we owe the feds more at the end of the year by this artificial stimuli through the year, making us think we have additional $ to spend when we do not? There has been no mention of a tax cut for us poor jerks.
Then again maybe this is a good thing--after all if most of us taxpaying Americans are behind on federal income taxes in 2010 for 2009, courtesy of the Ob(s)ama stimuli, will that qualify us for appointments as Secretary of Treasury? I feel that after my career I'd certainly qualify for Secretary of Health and Human Services. The Ob(s)ama appointees seem to have one unifying thread, none of them pay their income taxes on time or "appropriately."
Perhaps in addition to this faux-stimulation this is now an employment recruitment effort. Think of it, what better way to change DC than to get the likes of you and me to be the new appointees. I dare say we could do as good or better than Tiny Tim of the Treasury or Kathleen Sibelius of Health and Human Services. Maybe this is the other side of the coin, give them money to spend with a false assurance that it is theirs and then months later when they don't even recall how they've spent their $$, whack them with a tax bill. When they can't pay those income tax levies, seize them and transport them to DC to work as bureaucrats for the likes of the teleprompters.
Aaahh who said Ayn Rand or George Orwell wrote fiction? It may have been predictive. We are living in Gault's world indeed!
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Remembering and paying attention
Recently on our American WWII Orphans web we have been chatting about testing and VA benefits we received for college as a "gift" from the government to us war orphans. Most of the folks recall intensive VA testing and some were turned away as not qualified or not college material. I truly do not recall any separate VA testing for my benefits...I wonder if perhaps they accepted my school grades and tests for college to determine that I was college material. I know I'd have remembered an all day test and a trip to Pittsburgh at the time because that was the big city to me, a New Kensington girl. I do recall that at our senior awards when they mentioned scholarships, etc. that my VA $$ was mentioned. I know there was no one else in our high school class with a dead WWII father so someone must have known about the benefits and decided it was worth mentioning.
But this makes me think how it takes more than one's self to recall memories. It takes family and friends. I recognized this in November while we were in CA when Steve was in the hospital. He and Jerry both recalled my escapades in the white Toyota which I'd totally blanked out on. It took me a good week to remember that car but to both of them it was very clear. Funny who recalls what.
I've always been known to have a very good memory, especially remembering names of people, etc. People would ask me, how do you remember them? I don't know I just did. When I was giving details to the police about some unfortunate episodes, they questioned my clear memory but Jerry advised them, "best believe her she has nearly total recall." But these days I don't pay as much attention as I did in my career days to names although I've had to learn all in our move here to MN. I'd embarrass myself by not remembering some one's name. I decided I needed to just begin to pay attention, like I used to when I worked. After all these people are now around in my life, more so many than the career ones.
I was talking to one of my long time school/hood friends and she remembers different things than I do from our growing up years. But when we talk the memories return. It takes someone else to trigger those old memories. This is very different from my 92 year old MIL who remembers vividly the way back thens but doesn't know what she did an hour or day ago.
Memory is important to me. Maybe because my mother had Alzheimers and I listened as she forgot most things about life. I was so down hearted when she could not recall things from my childhood or even her trips to CA. That's an insidious thing to be robbed of memories and recall.
Maybe paying attention is the secret. I know for sure that when I don't pay attention to what I'm doing I often have troubles. Focus rather than meandering mind.
I just talked to Dorothy, who asked for my support as state Deputy party chair. I'll likely be attending our state party convention this year as I'm alternate delegate from this county and the delegate is not attending. Dorothy called me yesterday and I'd not yet returned her call. Well it was more important to her than to me. But when I said goodbye today I nearly called her Kathy. Where was my mind--well on a wander. As I said, it was her call not mine. I'd told her that I really hated these convention meetings--or most meetings which are a flash back to the bureaucracy. This is an all day meeting. I mean who meets for all day but politicians. You can bet my mind will be meandering then!
One of my mentors in my state career once commented that I have the attention span of a cocker spaniel. He knew that if I became bored in a meeting my mind would wander. Face it most meetings were boring and there were always those who had to say something ever so trite just to hear themselves talk. I often said, "I have nothing to add" to help a meeting close. Well wandering attention, served me well in the bureaucracy. Kind of like Senator Hiyakawa who used to sleep, giving the attention that the issue deserved. We'd be better off today if our congress slept--wait a minute they kind of do as they are brain dead anyway and do not read the legislation.
Back in that day, as a defense (entertainment) to meetings, I created my own cartoon--Delilahbert. I was a Dilbert fan, and decided there must be a female counter part. Wish I'd saved some of those sketches but I didn't. This was pre-cellphones where I could have been texting or web browsing. I will have the opportunity again to bring back Delilahbert and now that I've remembered her, I will have a way to amuse me in meetings. Aahhh remembering is a useful thing.
But this makes me think how it takes more than one's self to recall memories. It takes family and friends. I recognized this in November while we were in CA when Steve was in the hospital. He and Jerry both recalled my escapades in the white Toyota which I'd totally blanked out on. It took me a good week to remember that car but to both of them it was very clear. Funny who recalls what.
I've always been known to have a very good memory, especially remembering names of people, etc. People would ask me, how do you remember them? I don't know I just did. When I was giving details to the police about some unfortunate episodes, they questioned my clear memory but Jerry advised them, "best believe her she has nearly total recall." But these days I don't pay as much attention as I did in my career days to names although I've had to learn all in our move here to MN. I'd embarrass myself by not remembering some one's name. I decided I needed to just begin to pay attention, like I used to when I worked. After all these people are now around in my life, more so many than the career ones.
I was talking to one of my long time school/hood friends and she remembers different things than I do from our growing up years. But when we talk the memories return. It takes someone else to trigger those old memories. This is very different from my 92 year old MIL who remembers vividly the way back thens but doesn't know what she did an hour or day ago.
Memory is important to me. Maybe because my mother had Alzheimers and I listened as she forgot most things about life. I was so down hearted when she could not recall things from my childhood or even her trips to CA. That's an insidious thing to be robbed of memories and recall.
Maybe paying attention is the secret. I know for sure that when I don't pay attention to what I'm doing I often have troubles. Focus rather than meandering mind.
I just talked to Dorothy, who asked for my support as state Deputy party chair. I'll likely be attending our state party convention this year as I'm alternate delegate from this county and the delegate is not attending. Dorothy called me yesterday and I'd not yet returned her call. Well it was more important to her than to me. But when I said goodbye today I nearly called her Kathy. Where was my mind--well on a wander. As I said, it was her call not mine. I'd told her that I really hated these convention meetings--or most meetings which are a flash back to the bureaucracy. This is an all day meeting. I mean who meets for all day but politicians. You can bet my mind will be meandering then!
One of my mentors in my state career once commented that I have the attention span of a cocker spaniel. He knew that if I became bored in a meeting my mind would wander. Face it most meetings were boring and there were always those who had to say something ever so trite just to hear themselves talk. I often said, "I have nothing to add" to help a meeting close. Well wandering attention, served me well in the bureaucracy. Kind of like Senator Hiyakawa who used to sleep, giving the attention that the issue deserved. We'd be better off today if our congress slept--wait a minute they kind of do as they are brain dead anyway and do not read the legislation.
Back in that day, as a defense (entertainment) to meetings, I created my own cartoon--Delilahbert. I was a Dilbert fan, and decided there must be a female counter part. Wish I'd saved some of those sketches but I didn't. This was pre-cellphones where I could have been texting or web browsing. I will have the opportunity again to bring back Delilahbert and now that I've remembered her, I will have a way to amuse me in meetings. Aahhh remembering is a useful thing.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
It's Spring at last, I think
Exactly a week ago today on March 10 we saw the first robins of 2009. In fact it was about 5:00PM and our front yard from which the snow has melted but the ground is still not thawed hosted flocks of robins. Looking out the front window, I spotted their orange breasts. the robins are not our favorite birds here in MN. In fact, we have decided they are kind of nasty. Two days before the robin spotting I noticed a pair of doves on the ground at the bird feeders. That was my first clue of spring.
We have become amateur bird watchers here in MN. It's easy to do, just look out any window to spot cardinals, sparrows, nuthatches, chickadees, woodpeckers of all varieties, robins, crows, hawks, grackles, red winged black birds, juncos, wrens, buntings, etc. Well the variety depends on the season. The eagles are back along the Mississippi, fishing, standing on some floating ice and observing the water, then soaring with a catch. It's a marvelous sight and so common here that people pay little attention. For us though, the eagles are intriguing magnificence. One photo here from 2 years ago...Trouble is I can't get a photo because there is no pedestrian walkway on that highway bridge. Even I am not foolish enough to stop on a 65 mph roadway and pull over to get a photo. The same reason I can't get the best photos of our bluffs in all seasonal dress. Also along the river we see the returning egrets, cranes and herons. And all this just on our way to La Crosse.
At our bird feeders, though we have had a different species partaking this year, deer known as Mama and Bambi. They knock the feeders around to loosen the grain and seed and then come up and graze. Bambi is quite indifferent to me as I open the back garage door, step out onto the walkway and still keeping a respectable distance, calling "Bambi, get out of there..." Bambi looks at me non-chalantly, puts his head down and continues to graze, "oh, it's you, harmless." This severe winter brought the deer up to our doorsteps, to nibble on evergreens. While it's quaint it's not a good thing. There are many piles of deer do-do, aka scat all over the yards. And they are rude enough to leave scat in a drain pipe that Jerry'd set along the front to drain the melting snows into the farther part of the yard. The other day we chased Bambi and Mama from the feeders three times. Now when they see Jerry they must know that he used to hunt their cousin's in CA because they flee immediately. But me, not.
The last several days have been gorgeous and balmy in the high 50's and 60 degrees--sunny and warm enough for shirt sleeves. Walking weather and time to get out and patrol the neighborhoods. There are many homes for sale across So. 11th St. Several are by owners and one of interest to us is Jerry's cousin's. We have no interest in buying or moving from our home, but we are just observing. Their home is small and a good starter or a small enough for an older person, but no takers so far. It's been on the market since last fall. The cousins plant to vacate the north and head south to Texas where some of their adult children live. Funny thing is they lived there before and she, Shirley, didn't like it. but then Shirley doesn't like anything so that's no gauge. Another cousin also has one of the houses on his property for sale in an effort to evict a non-paying renter. The renter is his god-child who has never paid rent for 6 years, so why it's become an issue with him now, who knows. It has been a long winter.
But for now we know that spring is on it's way. The daylight savings time change brings us light to nearly 7:00PM here in the north. The downside of that is the sun shines so intently in through the kitchen and dining room that any dust on table or floor is readily observable. Really Friday, March 20th is the first official day of spring. So we look toward departing tundra and warmth ahead bringing tons of outside chores.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
One read and a flop
Continuing to post my reads so that at the end of this year I will know what I read and hopefully not buy the same book when I see them at a sale.
BIG FLOP: Red River by Lalita Tademy
I read her Cane River novel a couple years back and thought it was ok. So I picked this from the sale table of Barnes & Noble. Big Mistake. Supposedly based on the true story of what happened in April 1873 in Colfax, LA but slow writing. About the newly freed black residents during the beginning of Reconstruction. With friends in Alexandria, La. and having visited Colfax Parish I thought I'd enjoy this. Pure torture to get through 92 pages. I thought it would get better. This goes right into the donate bag.
Sunrise by Karen Kingsbury is one of those fluffy women's books that took only a couple sittings to breeze through. Karen is a well known Christian writer who is very popular with lots of women, and some men too, I guess. This book will be the first in the Baxter Family Sunrise series and introduces Dayne Mathews, the returning lost son from Hollywood to the Indiana Baxter family. It is an easy read and enjoyable enough and one of those books to set with when not wanting to concentrate too much. Family and faith triumph and all is well. And no 4 Letter words to worry about. No big language either .
The Preacher and the Presidents by Nancy Gibbs and Michael Duffy, published 2007 the true story of Billy Graham and his years as counsel to all the presidents from Harry Truman through George W. Bush. It's an excellent book and a keeper for my library and one I will only loan to those I absolutely trust to return it. I have this idea that grand daughter and niece can help me catalogue all these books when they visit in April--wonder if that will work. I can use their help to read titles, authors and enter into a data base. But back to this great book which I bought at the Christian book store using the gift certificate our departing minster gave me last year. I loved every page and reading the history of different events. Over the years I have developed more respect for Gerald Ford though I was very against his pardon of Nixon. I came to understand why Ford took that action and agree it needed to be done. This book contains other information about that in Ford's own words invoking his belief in God. As I read through the JFK era I realized how far we have not come as voters. Graham predicted that with the election of a Catholic president "never again would religion prove so divisive. I think that is a hurdle that has been permanently passed." How wrong, think of those who spurned Mitt Romney because he was a Mormon in 2008!
I especially liked reading the different episodes with the different Presidents as if I were reading short stories. I never lost my train of concentration because the chapters are distinctive. This is the kind of book that does not have to be read at one sitting and is still so enjoyable. From the skepticism of Harry Truman to the embrace of Nixon each presidential encounter is different.
It shows Billy Graham's humanity and weaknesses too as he gets drawn into some political areas where he vowed he would not be drawn. I was fascinated by the LBJ interactions with Billy Graham. The chapters on Nixon demonstrate Graham's devoutly helping his friend and yet even Billy Graham is manipulated and deceived by Nixon's shenanigans and perhaps distrusted by some of the Nixon colleagues. Billy Graham never admits that but trusts. The reader perceives that from the writing . This book shows Grahams's remarkable character and conservative leanings, but never reveals his political party. Perhaps it intrigued me because I too started out a Democrat.
There is interesting perspective about the disagreement between Norman Vincent Peale and Billy Graham and a mention of William Randolph Hearst. Billy Grahams's famous crusades are slightly mentioned this book. The real focus is interaction with the presidents and his determination to keep their trials and quests in confidence.
Some quotes to give a flavor of the writing: From the authors, "We knew that there were millions of people inclined to see Graham as a saint: we'd also encountered those who dismissed him as a showman, a sycophant, or a pawn of powerful men, with a mass-market message too silky and simple to merit further study. Graham agreed to talk to us without any conditions or control over what we would write. He had one challenge to us as we set out:"I hope it will just be fair and honest and tell the bad and the good." The book does that!
"Of the 11 presidents he'd known, 10 became friends and seven of those close ones. They entered into an unspoken covenant of private counsel and public support..."
"That still left the problem of election years. Again and again he vowed to stay out; again and again he was drawn back in. He always reminded people he was raised a Democrat and had friends in both parties and while this was true, it became clear long ago he had the soul of a mainstream moderate Republican...."
"His reluctance to challenge presidents privately or chastise them publicly reflected his conviction that the truth that mattered most was the gospel truth;..."
Reading this book left me much more curious about Billy Graham. And I have pulled his autobiography "Just As I Am" from my shelf and placed it out front on the To Be Read shelf.
Fat Tuesday by Sandra Brown, who is one of my favorite mystery, thrill writers is a typical Brown book. Burke Bastle is the cop with nothing left to lose and Pinkie Duvall is the corrupt attorney who would make him lose it all. It's a quick read with fascinating characters including a Madame of a New Orleans bordello and the former cop who becomes a recluse running a fishing resort on the bayou. My only quibble with Sandra Brown is that despite the intrigue and great stories she cannot write without including sex scenes. While some find these steamy I guess I show my age by being bored and skimming past that. However, this is another good read worth taking along on a plane ride. It's paperback and easily left behind once read.
That's the catch up on my 2009 reads so far.
BIG FLOP: Red River by Lalita Tademy
I read her Cane River novel a couple years back and thought it was ok. So I picked this from the sale table of Barnes & Noble. Big Mistake. Supposedly based on the true story of what happened in April 1873 in Colfax, LA but slow writing. About the newly freed black residents during the beginning of Reconstruction. With friends in Alexandria, La. and having visited Colfax Parish I thought I'd enjoy this. Pure torture to get through 92 pages. I thought it would get better. This goes right into the donate bag.
Sunrise by Karen Kingsbury is one of those fluffy women's books that took only a couple sittings to breeze through. Karen is a well known Christian writer who is very popular with lots of women, and some men too, I guess. This book will be the first in the Baxter Family Sunrise series and introduces Dayne Mathews, the returning lost son from Hollywood to the Indiana Baxter family. It is an easy read and enjoyable enough and one of those books to set with when not wanting to concentrate too much. Family and faith triumph and all is well. And no 4 Letter words to worry about. No big language either .
The Preacher and the Presidents by Nancy Gibbs and Michael Duffy, published 2007 the true story of Billy Graham and his years as counsel to all the presidents from Harry Truman through George W. Bush. It's an excellent book and a keeper for my library and one I will only loan to those I absolutely trust to return it. I have this idea that grand daughter and niece can help me catalogue all these books when they visit in April--wonder if that will work. I can use their help to read titles, authors and enter into a data base. But back to this great book which I bought at the Christian book store using the gift certificate our departing minster gave me last year. I loved every page and reading the history of different events. Over the years I have developed more respect for Gerald Ford though I was very against his pardon of Nixon. I came to understand why Ford took that action and agree it needed to be done. This book contains other information about that in Ford's own words invoking his belief in God. As I read through the JFK era I realized how far we have not come as voters. Graham predicted that with the election of a Catholic president "never again would religion prove so divisive. I think that is a hurdle that has been permanently passed." How wrong, think of those who spurned Mitt Romney because he was a Mormon in 2008!
I especially liked reading the different episodes with the different Presidents as if I were reading short stories. I never lost my train of concentration because the chapters are distinctive. This is the kind of book that does not have to be read at one sitting and is still so enjoyable. From the skepticism of Harry Truman to the embrace of Nixon each presidential encounter is different.
It shows Billy Graham's humanity and weaknesses too as he gets drawn into some political areas where he vowed he would not be drawn. I was fascinated by the LBJ interactions with Billy Graham. The chapters on Nixon demonstrate Graham's devoutly helping his friend and yet even Billy Graham is manipulated and deceived by Nixon's shenanigans and perhaps distrusted by some of the Nixon colleagues. Billy Graham never admits that but trusts. The reader perceives that from the writing . This book shows Grahams's remarkable character and conservative leanings, but never reveals his political party. Perhaps it intrigued me because I too started out a Democrat.
There is interesting perspective about the disagreement between Norman Vincent Peale and Billy Graham and a mention of William Randolph Hearst. Billy Grahams's famous crusades are slightly mentioned this book. The real focus is interaction with the presidents and his determination to keep their trials and quests in confidence.
Some quotes to give a flavor of the writing: From the authors, "We knew that there were millions of people inclined to see Graham as a saint: we'd also encountered those who dismissed him as a showman, a sycophant, or a pawn of powerful men, with a mass-market message too silky and simple to merit further study. Graham agreed to talk to us without any conditions or control over what we would write. He had one challenge to us as we set out:"I hope it will just be fair and honest and tell the bad and the good." The book does that!
"Of the 11 presidents he'd known, 10 became friends and seven of those close ones. They entered into an unspoken covenant of private counsel and public support..."
"That still left the problem of election years. Again and again he vowed to stay out; again and again he was drawn back in. He always reminded people he was raised a Democrat and had friends in both parties and while this was true, it became clear long ago he had the soul of a mainstream moderate Republican...."
"His reluctance to challenge presidents privately or chastise them publicly reflected his conviction that the truth that mattered most was the gospel truth;..."
Reading this book left me much more curious about Billy Graham. And I have pulled his autobiography "Just As I Am" from my shelf and placed it out front on the To Be Read shelf.
Fat Tuesday by Sandra Brown, who is one of my favorite mystery, thrill writers is a typical Brown book. Burke Bastle is the cop with nothing left to lose and Pinkie Duvall is the corrupt attorney who would make him lose it all. It's a quick read with fascinating characters including a Madame of a New Orleans bordello and the former cop who becomes a recluse running a fishing resort on the bayou. My only quibble with Sandra Brown is that despite the intrigue and great stories she cannot write without including sex scenes. While some find these steamy I guess I show my age by being bored and skimming past that. However, this is another good read worth taking along on a plane ride. It's paperback and easily left behind once read.
That's the catch up on my 2009 reads so far.
Monday, March 9, 2009
More to learn all the time
Lately we have been hearing a lot about Twitter. Jerry, who thinks I'm an up to date techie on most things, asks me, "What's Twitter?" Well I think it's another search engine but then I hear Martha Stewart talking about Twittering, asking her guest, "Do you twitter your friends?" Sounds obscene to me. Well time to take a break from Martha too, I think--her last few shows have featured rap guys (I hesitate to use the term artists) doing crafts with her....."Hey Martha girl, I mean ya know, this be 'de way to do "dat?" I suspect this is her attempt to draw in viewers. Well that draws out viewers like me who have less than no interest in rap, hip hop or whatever they call themselves. Or maybe this is to play to the players in DC as she touts Obama the Hero. Yech! Is everyone in the east a liberal?
Anyway do I need to now learn to Twitter? My cuz, Diane tells me I have to Tweet if I Twitter. She thinks she's funny! I do too!
Shoots, I have just mastered Facebook after nearly a year. It's where many of my friends and relatives are congregating. Yet I admit to being a bit cautious there too---I don't use my primary email for it and never play their games nor purchase through it. I'm just not that comfortable there yet. But yesterday while it snowed (again and still!) I downloaded Facebook to my Blackberry. So see I am capable of lots of techie stuff.
A compliment from a friend via email about how smart I was in a reply I wrote cautioning people to be careful on the 'net made me recall how being known as smart was the highest compliment folks could pay me. Then in my career days when we did a lot of personality profiles and assessments. Mine invariably revealed that I valued intelligence, smarts above all else. I still do value intelligence. And that is why I don't do stupids!
I have a low tolerance for dummies. But they are all around us. Boxes of rocks. The entire dumbing down of our schools has brought us to where today's high school graduates are clueless and need at least a couple years of college to achieve some smattering of education...well that supports the constant need for higher education till we have an entire society of people educated (using the term loosely) far beyond their level of intelligence.
Now I've been around long enough to know that my idea of stupid is often someone else's idea of a jewel! Else why would the voters have elected U NO Who in November? I continue to be disgusted with those who are led as lemmings and who are unable or unwilling to think, research or even ponder. Just taking media's word for it. and there we have the Obamas leading us along the path of the pied piper. Oh I know he has his fans, why some of my friends and family are Obamanites. OBAMA= One big ass mistake, America!
But dummies and stupids. When I get annoyed one of my long time friends in CA reminds me, "you never did do well with stupid." So why would it be any different today? And then lest I join them I have to continue to learn and I suppose that means researching and exploring things like Twitter.
Anyway do I need to now learn to Twitter? My cuz, Diane tells me I have to Tweet if I Twitter. She thinks she's funny! I do too!
Shoots, I have just mastered Facebook after nearly a year. It's where many of my friends and relatives are congregating. Yet I admit to being a bit cautious there too---I don't use my primary email for it and never play their games nor purchase through it. I'm just not that comfortable there yet. But yesterday while it snowed (again and still!) I downloaded Facebook to my Blackberry. So see I am capable of lots of techie stuff.
A compliment from a friend via email about how smart I was in a reply I wrote cautioning people to be careful on the 'net made me recall how being known as smart was the highest compliment folks could pay me. Then in my career days when we did a lot of personality profiles and assessments. Mine invariably revealed that I valued intelligence, smarts above all else. I still do value intelligence. And that is why I don't do stupids!
I have a low tolerance for dummies. But they are all around us. Boxes of rocks. The entire dumbing down of our schools has brought us to where today's high school graduates are clueless and need at least a couple years of college to achieve some smattering of education...well that supports the constant need for higher education till we have an entire society of people educated (using the term loosely) far beyond their level of intelligence.
Now I've been around long enough to know that my idea of stupid is often someone else's idea of a jewel! Else why would the voters have elected U NO Who in November? I continue to be disgusted with those who are led as lemmings and who are unable or unwilling to think, research or even ponder. Just taking media's word for it. and there we have the Obamas leading us along the path of the pied piper. Oh I know he has his fans, why some of my friends and family are Obamanites. OBAMA= One big ass mistake, America!
But dummies and stupids. When I get annoyed one of my long time friends in CA reminds me, "you never did do well with stupid." So why would it be any different today? And then lest I join them I have to continue to learn and I suppose that means researching and exploring things like Twitter.
Friday, February 27, 2009
Different worlds of communication
I've just spent several hours tidying up my project room, which is the big downstairs bedroom that is off the study and that also serves as my work out room. I love being able to just leave my projects in process out in what may appear disarray in that room. That way when, the mood strikes me I can go in there and start to work on sorting photos, scrap booking or whatever the pending project may be. I don't have to pack it back into a box and put it away because that room doesn't get any other use. And it's downstairs and not visible to guests when we entertain upstairs. Lucky me!
This bothers no one least of all, Janine, who announced she would be taking over the downstairs--this is our finished basement. I agreed she could have the bedroom down there but Grandma would have to tidy up her projects--some of which are strung across the bed. Janine likes the big screen TV & the rec-room and so fancies herself to be in charge of the lower floor. While I can keep my sewing strewed across the coffee table in the study I could not leave the bedroom in it's mess. So now things are packed up and into the closet. Trouble is, I won't likely get to doing anything with those photos, etc. for who knows how long now--out of sight out of mind.
Today while tidying I sorted and threw out some things. I started with a small box of photos and trinkets from my grandmother. She had saved these and I brought them from PA in 2004 when mom died. I did toss out photos of people no one knows. I have asked the only two who might--Aunt Jinx and Uncle Carl and they could not identify the people, so no need to keep these. Old black and white photos from how long ago. I found wedding photos of my cousin Roland who lives in Madison, WI and will mail those off to him. Another treasure which I'll pass along to him are photos of my aunt and 2nd cousin, Stella's, trip to visit them when they lived in Milwaukee. These show he and his folks and his brother and he should enjoy them. It was always a big deal to the Polacks in PA to take the train to Milwaukie...I made that trip every other summer with my grandparents. Rollie can pass them along to his daughter or one of his son's. Those are in an old black and white photo book, remember how the old photos were developed into these spiral photo books? They'd charge us who knows how much for such a thing today!
What I find very strange is how well the old black and white photos have lasted. Some of the photos are from the 1940's and 1950's, yet they are just as clear and certainly better than the color photos we took in the 1970's.
What brings me to the blog now is a telegram that I found. My grandmother had saved a Western Union telegram which Uncle Carl sent her in maybe 1944 or so, when he was in the Army. And there it is today in 2009! A telegram wishing her and all Happy Valentine's Day. Way before cell phones, texting, Facebook and/or email. Hey, this must even be prior to Hallmark cards in all their glory which are used to celebrate and greet today!
I wondered if it scared her when she opened it, because telegrams were not a good thing in World War II. She kept it a long time, so I cannot part with it in 2009. It will go into the Ostroski-Kochanowski Family scrapbook. That is when I get back to the projects! A historical relic of communication from the past. How different it is today.
So here it is, the scan of the telegram and photo of my grandparents and me. That's Teofil Kochanowski (Grandpap) and Rose Ostroski-Kochanowski (Baba to me) , me and Carl Konesky, their son and my uncle. He changed the Polish spelling to something more Americanized Konesky then he and the siblings all began to use Konesky.
I was the star of every photo. On the right, is Uncle Carl home on leave from the Army. There was no date on this photo, but I guess it about 1945 sometime. The clothes were out on the line which shows in another photo taken the same time, and yet in another there I am in the wash tub outside. So it must have been nice weather. And I know this was when they still lived on 2nd Avenue in the old row houses. They and Mom bought the house on Catalpa St. when I was about 2 years old, so here we are prior to that.
I just noticed that an old factory smokestack which would have been across the river looks like it's coming right out from my grandmother's head. Funny. The 2nd street row house was near the river and I know they were all too happy to move up the hill onto Catalpa St.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
From Party line to bluetooth/Ipod
I receive copies of my friend's father's poetry from time to time and today he emailed the one below about Party Line. Well, that brought back memories.
I remember our telephone in PA was a party line for a long time while I was growing up. My mother knew who the others were on the line. So she would watch her conversations, because she said some of them didn't have anything better to do than listen to everyone else. This was before afternoon soap operas on TV, heck it was before TV. I still remember that phone number--748R. The trivia that sticks in our heads!
Mom never really trusted the phones but continued to carefully watch her words when talking, years later. She said, "You never know whose listening in." I remember picking up the phone to use it and there would be someone already on it. By the time I became a teenager we had a private line. But unlike today I was not allowed to talk as much as I wanted on the phone. That used to tick me off. Talk about a world so different from today.
Anyway, my mother must have learned something from party lines,or from B-grade detective movies because she'd pick up the downstairs phone if I was nervy enough to sneak upstairs to talk "in private." So when I wanted to yak with my friends we had to go to each other's houses--within a block down the street anyway. We really lived in challenged times.
Then a day came when one friend got her own phone in her room. Her older sister worked and lived at home and gave that to her as a present. We thought she was quite lucky, unlike the rest of us. But it didn't matter because she was the only one with real privacy. The rest of us lived in phone restricted households, so she had no one else to yak with anyway! But we sure envied her phone.
Now with the ipods, cell phones, blue tooths, etc. that kids have attached permanently to their ears I wonder how we made it! And imagine these kids can talk freely about whatever and no Mom's ears to fear! Then again, their freedom comes at a steep price with such creatures as Internet predators, etc. I still think we were better off. Besides we were always walking to someplace or another and so spent lots of time outside--that was where we got our privacy!
Party Line
Hello! What are you doing today?
Well, I just called up to say ---
What's that? She DID? How'd you hear?
No! Wait, this line's not very clear.
Did you say she ---? That's what I thought.
Well, that's the first she ever bought!
What time was that? I mustn't forget;
Hold it 'til I get a cigarette.
Why, they were here until after eight.
Well, gossip's one thing I simply hate,
But I told her more than a thing or two.
O - Oh! Someone on the line, or was it you?
Of course! I know just how you feel,
(Quit clickin' this phone, you lousy heel!)
No, not you, but the way some act,
It's a pity they don't use a little tact!
I'd like to see it. How's it made?
But where did you put the rick-rack braid?
Bet it's cute. I'd like to see her in it;
Oh! Before I forget, have you tried Pinit?
No, I didn't. Never said a word.
Well, that's not the first, so I've heard.
That's what I say --- like an open page,
It's a wonder she wouldn't act her age!
Well, just thought I'd give you a buzz;
Wish I knew who that guy was,
Didn't you hear him try the line?
Yeah, been doin' it since almost nine!
Where were we? Oh, now I remember,
Didn't you hear? Nine, next November!
I thought so last week on the street.
Yeah, everybody thought her so stinkin' sweet.
You don't mean -- ? That awful clown!
Well, I did hear he left town.
You know that other, -- yeah, skinny legs,
Looked like a dog caught suckin' eggs.
Did you see --- Oh! That makes me mad!
If that guy needs the phone so bad
Looks like he'd get another line,
I pay this bill so this one's mine!
I guess that'll hold HIM, -- now, where was I?
Oh, if you're gonna be home, I'll drop by;
If there's any one thing that'll make me balk
It's some guy cuttin' in when I wanta talk!
Bye, see you in a few minutes!
Written by: Coleman Lee Williams
4/28/1900 - 5/5/1988
I remember our telephone in PA was a party line for a long time while I was growing up. My mother knew who the others were on the line. So she would watch her conversations, because she said some of them didn't have anything better to do than listen to everyone else. This was before afternoon soap operas on TV, heck it was before TV. I still remember that phone number--748R. The trivia that sticks in our heads!
Mom never really trusted the phones but continued to carefully watch her words when talking, years later. She said, "You never know whose listening in." I remember picking up the phone to use it and there would be someone already on it. By the time I became a teenager we had a private line. But unlike today I was not allowed to talk as much as I wanted on the phone. That used to tick me off. Talk about a world so different from today.
Anyway, my mother must have learned something from party lines,or from B-grade detective movies because she'd pick up the downstairs phone if I was nervy enough to sneak upstairs to talk "in private." So when I wanted to yak with my friends we had to go to each other's houses--within a block down the street anyway. We really lived in challenged times.
Then a day came when one friend got her own phone in her room. Her older sister worked and lived at home and gave that to her as a present. We thought she was quite lucky, unlike the rest of us. But it didn't matter because she was the only one with real privacy. The rest of us lived in phone restricted households, so she had no one else to yak with anyway! But we sure envied her phone.
Now with the ipods, cell phones, blue tooths, etc. that kids have attached permanently to their ears I wonder how we made it! And imagine these kids can talk freely about whatever and no Mom's ears to fear! Then again, their freedom comes at a steep price with such creatures as Internet predators, etc. I still think we were better off. Besides we were always walking to someplace or another and so spent lots of time outside--that was where we got our privacy!
Party Line
Hello! What are you doing today?
Well, I just called up to say ---
What's that? She DID? How'd you hear?
No! Wait, this line's not very clear.
Did you say she ---? That's what I thought.
Well, that's the first she ever bought!
What time was that? I mustn't forget;
Hold it 'til I get a cigarette.
Why, they were here until after eight.
Well, gossip's one thing I simply hate,
But I told her more than a thing or two.
O - Oh! Someone on the line, or was it you?
Of course! I know just how you feel,
(Quit clickin' this phone, you lousy heel!)
No, not you, but the way some act,
It's a pity they don't use a little tact!
I'd like to see it. How's it made?
But where did you put the rick-rack braid?
Bet it's cute. I'd like to see her in it;
Oh! Before I forget, have you tried Pinit?
No, I didn't. Never said a word.
Well, that's not the first, so I've heard.
That's what I say --- like an open page,
It's a wonder she wouldn't act her age!
Well, just thought I'd give you a buzz;
Wish I knew who that guy was,
Didn't you hear him try the line?
Yeah, been doin' it since almost nine!
Where were we? Oh, now I remember,
Didn't you hear? Nine, next November!
I thought so last week on the street.
Yeah, everybody thought her so stinkin' sweet.
You don't mean -- ? That awful clown!
Well, I did hear he left town.
You know that other, -- yeah, skinny legs,
Looked like a dog caught suckin' eggs.
Did you see --- Oh! That makes me mad!
If that guy needs the phone so bad
Looks like he'd get another line,
I pay this bill so this one's mine!
I guess that'll hold HIM, -- now, where was I?
Oh, if you're gonna be home, I'll drop by;
If there's any one thing that'll make me balk
It's some guy cuttin' in when I wanta talk!
Bye, see you in a few minutes!
Written by: Coleman Lee Williams
4/28/1900 - 5/5/1988
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
My winter readings
Thought I'd post what I've been reading since November. I recently signed onto the Wall Street Journal Book Readers blog. While trying to answer some questions I realized that I should keep track of what I've read if only to be able to answer what I liked and did not like. I am an avid reader, a lifelong hobby which keeps me comfortable and entertained. Here they are:
Are You Hungry Dear? by Doris Roberts aka Mom Marie of the TV show, Everybody Loves Raymond. It's an OK book with some interesting flashes into her life and efforts in show business. Most interesting are her inclusion of recipes which makes this book a keeper for my collection.
No Time for Goodbye by Linwood Barclay. This is a decent mystery about a rebellious teenage girl whose family disappears. As an adult she deals still with the trauma by becoming over protective toward her young daughter. I have not read anything else by Barclay, but would do so. It's a quick read that doesn't take much concentration, but kept me reading to find out what happened.
The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell. I had this book on my shelf for the past year and just finally decided I had to read it because the author has now written other books. Subtitled "How Little things can make a big difference", this book is fascinating and outstanding about why and how things happen as they do today using an analogy of epidemics. It's about change and those who affect, inspire and lead it. Three agents of change according o Gladwell are the Law of the Few, the Stickiness Factor and the Power of Context. I so enjoyed it that I sent a copy to my friend Sandy in CA. It can be read intermittently which I did while reading along something else for sheer entertainment. This book makes you think. Gladwell tells how Hush Puppies and Sesame Street became landmark successes. I especially related to his description of the Connectors, people who know lots of people. I think I'm one of those or at least I used to be during my career days in CA. Amazingly at Steve's memorial service his friend Ron described Steve as a spider who wove a web of friendship among many different peoples. That's a Connector! I was proud to hear our son was one. I also was intrigued at the description of the power of context and how children are shaped by their environments and the affect of their culture, their friends. Well there is much I could write about this book. It's definitely a keeper for me and one I'll browse from time to time again and again.
The Secret Lives of Fortunate Wives by Sarah Strohmeyer. This is an ok Chic book. To me these tales of these desperate housewives was tedious at times. A native son marries a reporter in Europe; this woman was raised on the other side of the tracks and her attempts to fit in and accommodate to their lifestyles, social posturing and veneers has moments. This is light reading. I found myself forcing me to keep reading. The most interesting part was when one of the desperadas gets into legal troubles. Would I read any other books by this author, probably not.
Still Aliceby Lisa Genova. An absolute smash read. This is her first novel and I can't wait for more. This book chronicles the descent into Alzheimer's by Alice Howland, a Harvard professor as well as the effect on the family and how she deals with the manifestations of her increasing dementia. Well written. Of immediate interest to me when I saw it on the table as a new release in Barnes & Noble. My mother had Alzheimer's so I avidly read anything fiction or non that I find about it. One memorable moment is when Alice arrives home from work and her husband looks at her with horror. He remarks something like, "You are supposed to be in Chicago at a conference." Alice recognizes then that her downslide is accelerating. How she tries to rationalize her behaviors and how she visits doctors alone at first without telling her husband are heart rending. This is also a keeper for me.
The Dream of Scipioby Iain Pears. I read only up to page 43 and could not continue. It's supposed to be thought provoking, set in Provence and flashes among three eras between 1943 and the time of the Romans. It was a local book club read here in La Crescent and all I can figure is they must have been desperate. With so many good books around I just could not waste anymore time on this.
Right now I am deep into The Preacher and the Presidentsa true story about Rev. Billy Graham and his counsel, friendships, and encounters with all the Presidents. I am enjoying it immensely as it has history and perspective. I will write more about it later.
Are You Hungry Dear? by Doris Roberts aka Mom Marie of the TV show, Everybody Loves Raymond. It's an OK book with some interesting flashes into her life and efforts in show business. Most interesting are her inclusion of recipes which makes this book a keeper for my collection.
No Time for Goodbye by Linwood Barclay. This is a decent mystery about a rebellious teenage girl whose family disappears. As an adult she deals still with the trauma by becoming over protective toward her young daughter. I have not read anything else by Barclay, but would do so. It's a quick read that doesn't take much concentration, but kept me reading to find out what happened.
The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell. I had this book on my shelf for the past year and just finally decided I had to read it because the author has now written other books. Subtitled "How Little things can make a big difference", this book is fascinating and outstanding about why and how things happen as they do today using an analogy of epidemics. It's about change and those who affect, inspire and lead it. Three agents of change according o Gladwell are the Law of the Few, the Stickiness Factor and the Power of Context. I so enjoyed it that I sent a copy to my friend Sandy in CA. It can be read intermittently which I did while reading along something else for sheer entertainment. This book makes you think. Gladwell tells how Hush Puppies and Sesame Street became landmark successes. I especially related to his description of the Connectors, people who know lots of people. I think I'm one of those or at least I used to be during my career days in CA. Amazingly at Steve's memorial service his friend Ron described Steve as a spider who wove a web of friendship among many different peoples. That's a Connector! I was proud to hear our son was one. I also was intrigued at the description of the power of context and how children are shaped by their environments and the affect of their culture, their friends. Well there is much I could write about this book. It's definitely a keeper for me and one I'll browse from time to time again and again.
The Secret Lives of Fortunate Wives by Sarah Strohmeyer. This is an ok Chic book. To me these tales of these desperate housewives was tedious at times. A native son marries a reporter in Europe; this woman was raised on the other side of the tracks and her attempts to fit in and accommodate to their lifestyles, social posturing and veneers has moments. This is light reading. I found myself forcing me to keep reading. The most interesting part was when one of the desperadas gets into legal troubles. Would I read any other books by this author, probably not.
Still Aliceby Lisa Genova. An absolute smash read. This is her first novel and I can't wait for more. This book chronicles the descent into Alzheimer's by Alice Howland, a Harvard professor as well as the effect on the family and how she deals with the manifestations of her increasing dementia. Well written. Of immediate interest to me when I saw it on the table as a new release in Barnes & Noble. My mother had Alzheimer's so I avidly read anything fiction or non that I find about it. One memorable moment is when Alice arrives home from work and her husband looks at her with horror. He remarks something like, "You are supposed to be in Chicago at a conference." Alice recognizes then that her downslide is accelerating. How she tries to rationalize her behaviors and how she visits doctors alone at first without telling her husband are heart rending. This is also a keeper for me.
The Dream of Scipioby Iain Pears. I read only up to page 43 and could not continue. It's supposed to be thought provoking, set in Provence and flashes among three eras between 1943 and the time of the Romans. It was a local book club read here in La Crescent and all I can figure is they must have been desperate. With so many good books around I just could not waste anymore time on this.
Right now I am deep into The Preacher and the Presidentsa true story about Rev. Billy Graham and his counsel, friendships, and encounters with all the Presidents. I am enjoying it immensely as it has history and perspective. I will write more about it later.
Long John Winter
For obvious reasons I have not been wrting. Finally at the urging of friends and my psyche I will get back to my meanderings. Briefly the Jan 10, 2009 service for Steve in Auburn could not have been lovelier, other than if it had not had to be. We were blessed with a sunny, balmy day with warmth streaming through the lovely stained glass windows at Auburn Pioneer UMC. The music was beyond comforting, praising, outstanding. The songs, On Eagles Wings, Father I Place Into Your Hands, Be Not Afraid and You'll Never Walk Alone stole the show. Everyone commented and some asked if we had recorded it. Jerry said, "Hell no! Who wants to go through this more than once!" Pastor John delivered a eulogy as though he'd known Steve, just from briefly talking to us. The comments about Steve's cars brought lots of memories to his friends and laughter around the church, a good thing. The church was filled with friends and family; not all signed in but it was about 200 folks! Beyond our expectations. We were overwhelmed. So many of Steve's high school friends came, I had not seen them since the 80's. So many spoke about their memories and about how dear a person and loving a friend Steve was. To see so many full of grief and support was a tremendous blessing. I know that his spirit had to be filled with joy and wonder overlooking us. I spoke first because I knew that if I could others would. And they did. Rhonda wrote her pages down and gave them to us. After each one spoke they gave us both a big hug. Jerry really fell apart at the church. He finally gathered himself to bring the urn downstairs to the fellowship hall. He said, "I guess I'm not as tough as I thought I was." One friend replied, "We knew that about you." One of Steve's long time friends,Eric Knierem is a pilot with Alaska airlines. His folks still live in the area and they told him about Steve's death. Eric and family live in Washington and were on vacation in Puerto Rico. Eric flew in just for the service. The service and the people helped dull the bitter sting. My only regret is that we did not get to speak to everyone. So many of the school folks, Steve's co-workers did not come down to the fellowship hall. But even in the hall with the food and visiting I did not get to speak to everyone. Jerry's brother, Rodney and family drove up from southern CA; his sister Barb flew in from Denver, my cousins Larry & Lori from Cottonwood and my aunt Pearl from Grass Valley and of course the Morrisons of Murietta, Alan (son) and Angel and Janine,grand daughter and Brian, grandson. Such are the times when we know what family really means.
Well life in the arctic tundra of MN goes on. Jerry acquired a bad head cold that is making the La Crescent rounds. Being a thoughtful husband he shared it with me in it's last stages. I of course had to improve upon it and am now in my last stages, at least I hope the last. The second full week is wearing me out mostly with the night cough; but this too shall pass. Some days last week I didn't even get dressed. Merely got up, drank hot tea and went back to bed. All my life whenever I'm sick I can sleep, so that works for me.
Such sub zero temperatures as we had through January prompted me to take Jerry's advice and buy long underwear. Even before in the CA Sierra mountains when I cross country skied I didn't need long underwear. Some days here when I ventured outside to help shovel snow in the beaming sun, I donned tights under my jeans. Jerry and others all wear longies. I noticed viisiting with a neighbor that she wore them too. So, maybe it's time for me to breeak down and invest to make life more tolerable in sub-zero temperatures. I was astonished at the cost of women's longies! So I waited till the big sale and even then at half off these cuddlies are costly. But now I'm ready. Thankfully now the snow is melting and temperatures are in the 40's and yesterday a record 51 degrees! We will be putting this long john winter behind us!
I've been working on the Snow White quilt for granddaughter. I've learned that I will not make another quilt starting with 2 1/2 inch squares. No sir, the next time I will have larger pieces. It is looking good but the cutting, sewing and pressing each seam is taking lots of time. That keeps me inside and out of trouble. I had to order some 108 inch wide fabric for the backing from Hancock of Paducah, KY. For several days I could not get through on the phone. Well, duh, it dawned on me. KY had those horrid ice storms and their power was out. Finally though I made contact. The fabric I selected will not be aailable until March 1, which is just fine. I will be done maybe with the front by then!
Well life in the arctic tundra of MN goes on. Jerry acquired a bad head cold that is making the La Crescent rounds. Being a thoughtful husband he shared it with me in it's last stages. I of course had to improve upon it and am now in my last stages, at least I hope the last. The second full week is wearing me out mostly with the night cough; but this too shall pass. Some days last week I didn't even get dressed. Merely got up, drank hot tea and went back to bed. All my life whenever I'm sick I can sleep, so that works for me.
Such sub zero temperatures as we had through January prompted me to take Jerry's advice and buy long underwear. Even before in the CA Sierra mountains when I cross country skied I didn't need long underwear. Some days here when I ventured outside to help shovel snow in the beaming sun, I donned tights under my jeans. Jerry and others all wear longies. I noticed viisiting with a neighbor that she wore them too. So, maybe it's time for me to breeak down and invest to make life more tolerable in sub-zero temperatures. I was astonished at the cost of women's longies! So I waited till the big sale and even then at half off these cuddlies are costly. But now I'm ready. Thankfully now the snow is melting and temperatures are in the 40's and yesterday a record 51 degrees! We will be putting this long john winter behind us!
I've been working on the Snow White quilt for granddaughter. I've learned that I will not make another quilt starting with 2 1/2 inch squares. No sir, the next time I will have larger pieces. It is looking good but the cutting, sewing and pressing each seam is taking lots of time. That keeps me inside and out of trouble. I had to order some 108 inch wide fabric for the backing from Hancock of Paducah, KY. For several days I could not get through on the phone. Well, duh, it dawned on me. KY had those horrid ice storms and their power was out. Finally though I made contact. The fabric I selected will not be aailable until March 1, which is just fine. I will be done maybe with the front by then!
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Don't Ask Me Why, Thoughts, and 90 Minutes
Photo taken Christmas Day to email to granddaughter in Ca who wondered about our snow. It's cold now but lots of snow has melted. We fear not, more on the way!
We are on countdown days till we leave for CA on 1/6. Steve's memorial service is coming together. Just like life, there were some unseen twists. But if we trust God as hard as it gets He will see us though.
Although I'd talked with John, the pastor, and arranged for 1/10 for the service, I began to fret about how to have the food after the service. I can hear Steve now, "MOM! You worry too much!" Jerry echoes that. I guess I do. They say so!
So I left a message on the church answering machine. Well both John and the secretary, Melinda were on vacation between Christmas and New Years. One well meaning senior lady went through the messages and tried to "help" by returning the call. I was not at home so she talked to Jerry. But Jerry didn't get her name only the hard message that John was on vacation for 2 weeks! And further the church did not have a food committee. And no one was there! When I came home Jerry said, "someone from the church called and it doesn't sound good." I assured him that I talked to John. Jerry remembered as he was sitting right there. But still this lady called. I asked if it was a certain senior person whom I suspected. He didn't know. So back to fretting. Will life ever flow smoothly again? Remember we are in MN and all this is being done by email, phone or fax, long distance. For the 3rd month in a row now I have exceeded my cell phone minutes which is big time $$. But this too shall pass.
In a panic, though I prayed for stillness, and for help, please, now? We tried to rent the Portuguese hall in Newcastle. Our friend found it was booked. So back to more serious prayer and that this would be fine. After all, I talked to John and this was a misunderstanding surely.
Yes indeed that is what happened. Another call New Years Day from Fred assuring me John would be back and all would go fine. Last night John himself called to assure me; he'd heard the rumors. When he identified the person I knew that was who would have gotten it twisted--I'd even suggested her name. Lord when I get older please stop me from meddling, from creating havoc by trying to do good. Actually Lord stop me for doing that right now anyway at whatever age.
There have been two blessings through this. First, Adrian Pell who is such a talented humble musician sent an email about a new Church blog at Pioneer. When I asked him to play for the service he said, "Yes." His calendar is empty that day! Hallelujah! Then last night I talked with Dawn Mailcoat who sings beautifully and who will be able to sing the hymns--if we are especially lucky Shawn and Lynn will join her in a trio! Hallelujah again! I want upbeat, no organ, piano and lighter singing. I've asked for Be Not Afraid, Eagles Wings, Father I Place into Your Hands, Is It I Lord, and You'll Never Walk Alone. We used You'll Never Walk Alone at Mom's--she loved that song and so do I.
You know the hardest thing to gauge--how much food for the luncheon after the service? More fretting. Steve's good friend Wes who was trained as a first class chef is preparing the food. I was in distress trying to estimate numbers. Wes said, "Pat don't worry we are not having this to make people fat! If they come to a funeral to eat only that's too bad. We will just do our best."
After all isn't that what we can do anyway in all circumstances? Just do our best. It's what I told Steve; it's what I tried to do.
Last night I went outside in the snow to burn November and December pages from the 2008 calendar. Kind of my own little private burning bowl ceremony. But it was so cold the pages would not burn. I'll try again using a clay flower pot today! The days that came starting with the November hospitalization and following on through Steve's rehospitalization December6 to his passing on December 18 are days I will never forget. But we will try to keep the best memories and not recall the jagged edged days as we get on in life--this life we have. This life that is for the living.
I just read Don Piper's "90 Minutes in Heaven." A remarkable true story of the Baptist preacher who dies and is Heaven for 90 minutes before returning to life. It had been on my shelf for awhile. It was perfect timing for me to read it. Being a believer is easy to me but to read an experience that validates belief is encouraging. I recommend it for anyone, especially anyone who is grieving. One line that struck me, "We never lose someone when we know where they are...." referring to Heaven and Belief. So we never lose Steve. We know he is in a better place. We are just left behind here to do our best.
A friend in CA has a treasury of poetry and verse written by his late father. He shares it with me email and I always enjoy reading these. I keep saying he and his brother should publish these and maybe have some sketches or photos along with some of the writings. They have copyrighted them. Last summer, with his permission, I took one, "The Library" to our little La Crescent library. Lavonne Beach, our librarian, loved it so that she framed it and it is on display right at the front where books are checked out. Here's Don't Ask Me Why"
Don't ask me why the sun shines all the day.
Don't ask me why there's beauty in lambs at play.
Don't ask me why the weak have the heavier load,
Or why the savior of the garden is the ugly toad.
Don't ask me why that lovers always quarrel.
Don't ask me why the skein of life's a snarl.
Don't ask me why sound reason aside we shove,
Or, why we always kill the thing we love!
Don't ask me why we do the things we do.
Don't ask me why to ourselves we're seldom true.
Don't ask me why we revel, deep, in strife
Or, pleasure take, in baiting man or wife!
Don't ask me why we take the easier road.
Don't ask me why we seldom share the load
Of those, the weak, whose loss was but our gain,
Who suffered much that they might ease our pain!
Don't ask me why we love the meaner part.
Don't ask me why we shun the breaking heart
Of those, whose life, it could be ours to share
And, sharing, make it easier to bear!
Don't ask me why; I'm only human too.
Don't ask me why, the answer is never new
But lies in the womb of Time, endless, without span.
Ask of your God, but never ask of man!
Written by: Coleman Lee Williams
4/28/1900 - 5/5/1988
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Closing out 2008, the worst year of our life
This photo shows me and Steve New Years Eve 1969. Here it is 39 years later and another NY Eve. We were on our way to friends for our annual gathering in that phot.
Right now I am not looking forward to our trip to CA for obvious reasons. I had the dumbest phone call yesterday with Roseville Telephone CO, Surewest. Someday this will be funny but right now it was frustrating. I called them to disconnect Steve's phone. I talked to 2 fools. Both of who assured me only Steve had authority to make any arrangements for that phone. I repeatedly tried to explain, "didn't you hear me or don't you understand? He is dead. I'm trying to help you by notifying you." The second person in "customer care" was dumber than the first one--she asked, "Do you have a power of attorney?" I don't. (She is so foolish that she does not know that a POA is only good while someone is alive. But I didn't want to engage her any farther.) I hung up in disgust after wishing them a good day and saying they could do whatever they wanted. It's not my problem! Jerry shrugged it off--he said I talked to them too long anyway. Obviously they did not want my help so they could do whatever they wanted. When they try to collect any $$ that will be funnier. Then I suppose they will threaten to disconnect his service!
I called the apt. mgr., landlord today who said that it is the worst phone co in the country but he would try to contact them as he has had to have services disconnected before for deaths, etc. or when someone moves. Steve's friends cleared out the apt. and gave the keys back last Saturday. God bless them all.
Tonight for New Years we will go to the Legion for an early dinner--Prime Rib buffet for Jerry and Scampi for me. Talked to Aunt Pearl last night (Uncle Henry's widow) who said she is going to burn the calendars for 2008. I agree. Surely better times are ahead.
To top off the year, our garage door and opener has to be replaced. Jerry had found a replacement gear on line, ordered it from NY and spent Christmas Day fixing it. Saving $$ he though with the part being only $38. Well it lasted only until yesterday and then again stripped the gear. Nothing to do but get it all replaced. It is only 10 degrees outside today and even with the heated garage we em joy, too cold to be monkeying further. Well a friend recommended Overhead Door Co in LaCrosse who came out and today replaced the opener. Things are looking up. Jerry had been considering replacing our big wooden garage door with a new metal one anyway but thought it would last till spring. He thought wrong. So we are $1900 poorer but now have an operating door and the new one will be installed after we return from CA. As one friend says, any problem that can be fixed with $$ is not a problem.
Amen to 2008.
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Plodding along
Christmas Eve day I kept busy scanning photos of Steve from the many loose albums. That was soothing and here is one from Christmas 1973. I emailed them to his friend Ron who is putting a slide show together in CA for Steve's friends who are gathering privately. On the same day the hospital from Roseville called me about filling out Medi-Cal papers so they can get some reimbursement. I said I would try to do what I could for them when we arrive in CA. Understandably his friend Ron decided not to be signing things. Can't blame him.
I understand that the post office has a hold on Steve's mail and that they will release it when we go with a copy of the death certificate. Who knows what bills there are. We can't nor do we intend to pay those; our finances getting drained with the funeral, flight, etc. Even dying is not inexpensive in CA. The obituary in three smaller newspapers where friends will most likely see it is costing $274.
I found a website on grief yesterday that had several letters from adults who have lost adult children. There is an org. "Compassionate Friends" for surviving parents with a chapter in La Crosse, WI. I may check it out next year. Trouble is so much of that is for those who lose children and this is different as the website pointed out. Something I read did not sit well with me--they say allow 18 months for the grief to begin to ease! 18 months! that's a long time. I know it will take time but that surprised me.
I feel a tiny bit more solace with Steve's passing. He asked us to come when he was in the hospital the first time and we did, giving up the best laid plans. And although my last days with him had some very rough moments and not the best, I am glad we went to CA. I'm still holding onto that it was his time; I can hear the Lord say, "well this is enough" as he was in the ICU, sedated, and at the last medically paralyzed. This was not my boy, not the son I prayed for when I knew I was pregnant, not the child we raised with all the hopes in the world. Hi life was too short but at least I will no more worry about what's happening with him. I know he is in a better place.
We are considering going to the Legion for NY Eve dinner; prime rib buffet for Jerry & I'll just have the scampi. I don't like prime rib. Dinner's early between 5--9 so that will work. We have not seen midnight for many years---eyes don't stay open that long.
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